The way they’ve been getting treated by the Cubs lately, the Cards probably also feel like they need to wear diapers.

Lighten up, Francis.

The thing with Belichick is that he hates 99% of the stupid questions that reporters ask (and I don’t blame him). But every once in a while he’ll get asked an actual football question and suddenly he’ll give you a 10 minute strategy dissertation off the cuff.

As a Jets fan, I’ve suffered a great many indignities, from the Buttfumble, to Tebowmania, to Brett Favre’s penis.

This is dumb, useless low hanging fruit that a severely underdeveloped 12 year old with a basic familiarity with mlb history could produce; the only thing cubs fans care about with regard to their owner is that he/she doesnt hesitate to spend money to field a contender. Anything else is window dressing.

Don’t lump us underdog lovers in with this shit owner. Fuck fuck fuck fuck. Now I need to boycott them because they have some asshole at the helm.

Entertaining, but not particularly accurate. An egg is an egg (or an ovum, if you prefer). Chickens, not being mammals, do not have periods.

except that’s not Chick-fil-A’s menu

lordy did an omelette kill your parents or something

It’s not enough for you to kill millions of chickens—you have to force them to go down the hatch right beside their babies? Does this “turn you on?”

YOU SHUT YOUR DAMNED DIRTY MOUTH!!!

Still has a winning record as an NFL coach though.

That’d be awfully fucked up if Harlan got punished for such a great call.

Play with that dog!

“Hi, I ate this entire steak and all the sides, but I didn’t like them. Please comp this meal.”

If you play a game for 50 hours and ask for a refund you are a lame ass.

Yeah. It was called Destiny. I’ve been clean since last October.

Whitlock looks like a first responder gave him that jacket to keep him warm until his parents came to pick him up.

I recently met a vegan Crosfitter who answered the age-old question.

The Four Rules