"Now take dog away. Kill it or something."

My avatar approves.

Never forget.

I liked him better with the dreads and the cheesy prominent abs but that asshole will never not be hot!

Um? WOAH. That picture.

These pretzels are making me thirsty.

And yet the film has 39 positive, 26 negative reviews and is currently fresh on Rotten Tomatoes. Some reviewers are calling it a classic. OMG, a work of art has mixed reviews!

Of course women of Jezebel like this review.

Ah, the halcyon days of the '90s, when we humans dwelled placidly under the dot-com bubble, foolishly investing all of our money in Beanie Babies and plucking out most of our eyebrow hairs....

That's actually kind of sad. =(

Man, Jamie Dornan looks about 1000x better with facial hair. I was not really feeling his crazy eyes in this trailer. But since I have no desire at all to see this movie, I suppose that I'm not the target audience anyway.

That Fifty Shades gif in the beginning:

please. team aidan ALL DAY.

Did you know that Big and Aiden hang out in real life? As frequently as 2 years ago they drank the night away and picked up girls at a Los Angeles bar I used to work at.

You do realize those were in-show advertisements, don't you? Genius really, as you're proof how well in-show placement makes a mark in the mind, but do not assume those product placements came for free. SJP took care of her girls' paychecks. You have to have additional revenue to keep the cast in line. Product…

Personally I'm hoping for a current era adaptation of Wide Sargasso Sea (because I can't get through the freakin' book.)

Ok one more. You're welcome.

what about Homercles?

Can we not get a lifestyle website for people who hate being inspired and are just generally dreadful?

What a lot of self congratulatory twaddle.