All I can think of caulliflower.

I’m not a lawyer specializing in NCAA regulations, but is “Everyone was doing, not just athletes” really a valid defense of breaking academic eligibility rules? If it is, that’s a stupidly obvious loophole, but if not I think I actually side with the NCAA on this one.

That’s kind of awesome. Zoos generally get criticized for not having enough space for animals to roam around, but if you could combine it with a golf course, you’d get more space and more revenue. Plus, you know, golf that might actually be worth watching.

That was more the equivalent of an unpaid internship gained through his father’s connections than a job he had to live off of, though.

Garfield is a training-wheels comic. It acclimates kids to the formalism of jokes without having to “get” anything. Of course you think it’s awful as an adult or even a teenager, that’s because your tastes have already developed past it, just like you stopped listening to Raffi at some point.

Pogo vies with Calvin for the #1 spot. I think Calvin wins on art but it’s not an open-and-shut case.

Learn to play Five-Card Nancy.

Who signed off on that backdrop? It’s - what’s the word? Oh, right - terrible.

Obviously referring to Haskell Curry, U.S. mathematician and pioneer in the field of combinatoric logic.

He lived 7 years longer than the actual Jesus, so not bad.

It’s “anthropocentric”, you fucking amateur.

It’s not really an inferiority complex if you’re just inferior, is it?

X-Men has pretty much always been terrible, for the most part. A couple of fantastic storylines here and there, but terrible filler in between. You remember Phoenix and Dark Phoenix but forget the Freedom Force, Storm’s tedious vision quest to regain her powers, and noseless Wolverine.

She says this now, but she said it before, too. She’ll come back in another 10-15 years.

Your death sentence has been commuted to eternity in prison.

Reminds me of people who put disclaimers at the end of e-mails, which are of equally fanciful efficacy.

In general, yes, a club can refuse, but it’s a bad situation for a team to keep a player that wants to leave and is getting offers. The opposite situation, selling a player that would like to stay, is more common, but a player that really doesn’t want to go somewhere else can refuse to sign a contract with the team…

To answer your last question, because the actual salary and contract details are usually a) kept under close wraps, and b) contain a lot of performance bonuses that players’ unions in the US typically forbid. Neymar’s contract was recently leaked, his base annual salary is only €5 million, but he was also guaranteed…

I think doctors generally err somewhat on the side of early death, because a prognosis like that tells you how much time you have to get your affairs settled. You wouldn’t want to think you have three to six months to straighten everything out and then kick it after two weeks, in the middle of changing your will or…

Yeah, and another thing about the First Amendment is that it affords the strongest free speech protections of any country in the world, so exercising your First Amendment rights to make an anti-American statement is about the dumbest shit imaginable. You won’t get prosecuted for it, but pretty much every thinking…