get out.

Wasn’t Steve Jobs pretty wealthy? Didn’t he die of cancer? Seems to negate the old geezers argument.

You can live a healthy life and still get cancer. Or MS or ALS, or several other diseases. Or, you know, get in a car accident.

Reading his spoken words makes me FUCKING STABBY. He is so unbelievably good (?) at stringing words together without saying anything at all. Pronouns are this man’s favorite thing.

Trump: I don’t stand by anything.

THIS IS WHAT JOURNALISTS NEED TO BE DOING. DO NOT JUST MOVE ON TO THE NEXT QUESTION. CALL THIS MOTHERFUCKER OUT.

“It should be talked about.”

“Okay, let’s talk about it.”

“That’s enough. We’re done.”

“I think our side’s been proven very strongly”

The best part is that Dump couldn’t just stay in the White House and pout or even haul ass down to Mar-A-LotsaTaxpayerMoney, he had to go hold a spite rally in Penn and force his toadies to cheer him until he re-bloated with false pride and vanity.

There’s a reason why conservatives rant about liberal snowflakes:

I love how our “toughest” president in history is such a wimp than he can’t even stand a correspondents dinner.

Surely the sexy trifecta you refer to is this one (Which looks like it could also serve as the opening credit for Law & Order: NAFTA)

Not to be shallow, but it’s extra mortifying that the face of our country is so goddamn hideous.

Memories...........

Which of these is the ugliest part of NAFTA?

Everyone should call in pretending to live in the Los Angeles in Alien Nation, report “newcomer” crimes against them, ransacking their houses in search of spoiled milk. It might take the operators a while to catch on and waste more of their time.

I don’t think I’ll ever understand the desire to support a religion that actively hates you. Cognitive dissonance is a hell of a drug.

2013 GOP

The GOP went full retard, and you never go full retard. They seem to have forgotten that they used the threat of a shutdown EVERY SINGLE YEAR to try to get their way.

This is​ the greatest GIF in the history of giffing.