Turkey is everything and you’re a monster, Kevin Pang.

So we all agree that this is baby Superman’s pod from Krypton right? That’s what I thought...

I bought this immediately.  My husband tried to stop me, but I explained to him: “Look, I know this is a stupid waste of Monday, but I need that glass in my life right now.  I will not be happy if we leave this store without it.  Do with that information what you will.”

Leave it to Senate Republicans to still not understand what “literally under assault” actually means.  

Honestly I think the real star here is the woman behind him to the left.  The yearning look in her eyes just screams “I’m so sorry that your entitlement has been challenged” in that “I’m part of the 53%” way...

How was this not the immediate first response?

Okay...but no one in that shot is dressed for “tree planting.” Everyone is dressed for a promotional shot (even the men...I mean, I don’t remember the last time I wore my business casual to plant a tree). So...

Slander is a spoken statement.  This would be libel, as it is a written published one.  If it were libel.  Which, Ben, it is not. 

Why is there a pull up bar placed over it?

I find it unnerving that I read the sign in the image from this article and actually wondered “Wait...is Taylor Swift involved in the Robert Mueller investigation?” because I LEGITIMATELY believe that that is something that is possible these days. 

“Congratulations, Takeout reader, you are about to embark on the weirdest food story of the week.”

“...they called the police because my child was crying because he was getting a whooping. Who does that?”

Oh my God...his lawyer’s name is actually Becky.

Came here to say this.

“Poutrage” is definitely my new favorite word.

Girl, that’s how you get your dog to take its meds...not your friends.

A note: I don’t believe that either employee was a student - which made their positions all the more precarious in the end.

So is the name “Great Gerwig” an on-purpose anagram or typo?

“Keep on telling me who I am. I dare you.”

I thought this was well handled - but I wonder how she’s going to deal with Senator Franken now...who she just had on her show.