They should start with the Silverdome.

I hope someone else cleans all of those foreclosed houses in Detroit.

Atwood, who has a court hearing tomorrow, was released into the custody of his mother, who was at the game with him.

Somewhere Ryan Fitzpatrick’s son is thinking:

Now that I see it in action, I’m on board with Trump building a wall to separate the rest of us from the Browns.

They’d have to look all the way over at Section 101. Or 102. Or 103...

This man is IRREPLACEABLE! How would the Vikings ever find an overweight, heavily-bearded, Norse-looking man who can ride a motorcycle in Minnesota?!!?

Can a Deadspin staffer start up a database that details which active pro athletes have either been accused/convicted/exonerated of serious crimes like sexual assault? I need a one stop shop for determining which sports people I can feel mildly ok cheering for

I’m sure Kane appreciates this story.

My son doesn’t know anything. He can’t poop in a toilet or open a jar or even identify shapes with 100 percent accuracy.

Rossi is absolute garbage- I have no idea how he got that job, but I highly doubt it was on merit.

He’s just doing his part.

It’s the only time all season the Cubs will be anywhere near number 1.

Hm, that's probably it.

The NFL of the 1990s was weird as hell.

Meanwhile, Packer fans are still waiting for Mike McCarthy's balls to show up.

Ugh.

fuck it, now i want a Toblerone

That's called "thursday" here in Anchorage.

"No Jameis, remember? You're fucked right in the pussy"