Of course he is obsessed with field goals, they are going to need to kick one every time the defense gets a turnover leading to an offensive three and out.

Calm down people, it’s not a McRib.

This is trumpian levels of ridiculous.

And a horse.

If you knew the backstory about how his dad walked out on him and his mom on Christmas Eve taking the families only baseball you would not think it was so heartwarming.  No son, your dad will not come back for this baseball.

Training camp must have been weird with all the horses there.

My Dad once went to a dog race and would bet on the dog that took a dump right before the race.  

All I said was we need a mattress for Courtney Love.

Then how do you explain NBA players being able to dunk without being lit on fire?

Bob Dole can help your flaccid penis get past third. 

I am sure I will get the same response to the new XFL as my wife gave me to the AAF last February:

Not to be outdone, Del Taco is partnering with Rolaids and Immodium.

As a Lion’s fan I envy the Texans identity as a perennial first round playoff knockout team.

I feel his pain. I still get chills thinking about the day the UN Security Council voted that instant replay be allowed to review pass interference in AMERICAN football. 

Strickland also managed to step on a number of rakes on his way to the dugout.

I love sushi but I HATE nori.  The use the freshest fish but that shit is so old it reeks.  I found a lot of places that you can get rice or soy wraps and I love em.

At least he did not bichette about his strikeout.

He says there should be a sign ... and in every locker room I have been in there is a sign, no cell phone use.

I was driving back from my in-laws with my Wife and her parents cat. I put on NFL and a Giants-Eagles game was on. When the Eagles scored a touchdown the cat let out a guttural cry, essentially saying fuck the Eagles.  That cat really hates birds.

It is nice to see professional players invest back into their community.