Please remind to tip for the free kid’s meals, and to tip extra if I have to make GD Shirley Temples and clean up a mess under the table. Don’t take kids out to eat unless you’re prepared to tip for the extra time I have to spend addressing your special needs.

or, use it for the opposite reason: make sure that the place you’re about to go isn’t full of loud, sticky children!

This must be it: http://files.consumerfinance.gov/f/201501_cfpb_…

I actually think this is a great idea. Although, if the item must be new, unopened, how exactly does that "give shoppers the impression that they stand behind the quality". If they stand behind the quality, they'd offer a 1 year return even on things you've tried and failed for you. You would never have a chance to…

Invest in accessories that would change the overall look of your current wardrobe. There are always sales/coupons at dept stores and etsy deals, so you don't have to spend much.

I have to apologize to this column, in general. I've sometimes expressed my amazement at the simple concepts that are documented and posted as if they are epiphanies for the readers.

Another great protip is that you can drown anything in ranch dressing.

I'd push back on this a little bit, because a good answer to this question can be a show of maturity, which means you're getting a quality employee instead of a stand-and-breath-er.

On the other hand, I drink because I enjoy drinking. You can easily say, "well, why not just cut everything fun and ennoyable out of your life, because it's not really that hard to live a life with no fun. I mean just look at all those monks (except the Belgian ones who brew fantastic beer)."

Dude, for some reason any amount of alcohol completely takes away my breathing stamina. Like, one beer and I'm huffing and puffing after climbing a flight of stairs (whereas normally I can climb several flights without becoming winded). After drinking I run 3 steps and I'm like Homer Simpson, leaning against a fire…

Um, no. I enjoy tasting things that taste good. Not because it's always been around, but because it tastes good in my mouth. Drinking isn't the evil, anymore than cakes or donuts or cheese or anything else is the evil.

Some of us need to drink to make being around people like you tolerable.

I have to Google those everytime.

Did you read the letter?

Dear first dude,

If you resign, you probably can't collect unemployment, so don't resign unless you have another job.

I think the best way to get a good haircut is find a stylist you trust. Getting a flattering haircut is more than face shape. You have to consider hair texture, how much care you're willing to put in, etc. It doesn't have to be expensive. I try to find people who have talent, but not too much experience so their rates…

Just like with human health care there is wide disparity in the rates that are charged by different vets for the same procedure. I can definitely pay to shop around.

I would think a good bed and nice sheets, etc. would be pretty high up there. You spend a lot of time sleeping. And a decent set of towels, too.

Books and Movies