if you can't afford first class, take a bus. Boom - problem solved.

there is a strong grundle scent emanating from any number of crotches, and swirling about in an infectious concoction of cock stench....that is almost too much to bear.

i put the click-clack in the Cadillac, in case fuck boys try to invade.

...and if i had to guess, you probably munch your own fecal loaves.

(you whack off)

the hair should obscure it...you will be fine, my son.

solidoodle 3d printer....all i can think of is asses shitting.

try a manger...that shit is as cheap and european as it gets.

another common miscue on the bible's account: instead of "Let there be light.." it was supposed to read "Let there be bipartisan political agendas"

there is a typo in the bible. John 11:35 "Jesus wept." should actually read: "Jesus fucking break-danced ."

they said, christ don't hurt em! but i made it rain on that ho for forty days anyhow...

thanks but...i don't have a very good record over there...

be careful america...i am reminded of the plight of Icarus

a lot of people ask, "jesus - who is your favorite actor?" a good father would never play favorites with his sons and daughters, but the truth is, for my money? - it doesn't get better than when Tim Robbins plays Nuke Laloosh

in real biblical times, i was actually quite fit, very dark and cut up. but soon after the religious explosion of the byzantine empire - we realized that a buff christ really didn't test well with our target demographic. so we went with the scrawny Caucasian look...

oh gosh...i thought i smelled a twat in here.

they call me Sheik the Shineboi...cuz i ball hard with a straight face.

if I (jesus "hotboy" christ) came back today....i would wear crocs, and you bastards would lose your shit.

you ever suck feet for coke?