I did find out that those records are public as I suspected. I realize I live more in black and white than most — my husband is usually the same as me in that regard — and that is not necessarily a good thing. But I don’t know how to live with someone who will have his name publicly tied to this case forever. I will…

That is exactly how I see it. Completely separate from my sibling’s molestations, I was raised Catholic in a pedophile dumping ground. The only benefit of the doubt I can give my husband currently is that this is not my first rodeo, I have seen people respond the wrong way my entire life. I want my partner to respond…

Exactly. And I am so very sorry for your kid. I’ve asked him how character letters would make him feel if it was his daughter or son, or any of our nieces and nephews. I would be enraged and that is why I can’t support it. I truly believe that if it was my relative under these circumstances (there is zero room for…

Great point! I've also been thinking about highlighting the kids that were exploited for his pleasure, they could be my sister and brother. He doesn't need to go to prison for the rest of his life, but my husband also doesn't need to vouch for his character.

Yeah. I will. And I plan on telling him as much once we get a chance to speak face to face. I’m hoping I can remind him how he feels about how my family has dealt with a similar experience and how he is following their footsteps. So far I have told him child porn is not a victimless crime, the children being assaulted…

I can’t fault parents for that. I’m not a parent, I can’t say what I would do and I understand that relationship clouding your judgement. This person is a close but not immediate family member. What I’ve read about pedophilia/paraphilia is that, while there is no way to guarantee rehabilitation, strong community is a…

I feel like this would be the time to do it. He knows the fraught relationship I have with my parents (I love them dearly, but this is a very present and permanent shadow) and that this will likely result in a similar result. I don't think that I would leave him over it, but the respect I would lose for him would be…

I am in need of help. My husband received an email on Thursday evening informing us that two years ago a relative (let’s call him Humbert) was arrested and indicted on 8 different charges of solicitation of a minor and possession/distribution of child pornography. The email was requesting character reference letters…