Mashed avocado on a well toasted hunk of pain levain with pickled red onion, arugula and a bottle of screwtop rosé will start any weekday off right. interview-schminterview, bon chance!

It’s like they don’t even have the 1st Amendment over there.

“Problem solved!” -Dan Snyder

“...no... I thought- I thought you said that you were alright... Spider”

Hard to tell, but probably best to send in the Satanists to get it sorted.

The alternative ending to World War Z wherein the survivors end up selling power back to the grid.

I always eat a cheeseburger on Tet because fuck Norway.

The Venn diagram of his competitors, the people he’s wooing, and the emotional and intellectual capacities of actual 6th graders would shock you. Or maybe not, cttoi

“Goddamn this weak sphincter of mine!!”

Well that was weird

no sé

Ruiner!! Actually I blame my dog who pulled me away because he had to shit. Though now that I think about it, half of the commentariat must've been waiting to pounce. So good job.

And you thought telling a child they're adopted was hard...

They’re also really good at picking fruits and vegetables for their private chefs to serve their kids amirite huh? huh? wakawaka

+1 cup of mare’s sweat

It’s a trap. Annoying yoga bro or smarmy false prophet lurks under that scrunchy.

Who Is San Diego.

How’d that go?

Tangentially related appointment viewing, a classic.

Your tortured love affair with GM is delicious. Never give up, those windmills will fall yet, keyboard warrior