I can only say, you can’t help but notice and remember who you thought you were going to war with and who didn’t show up,

This does indeed suck for Lithuania, but good on FIBA for holding the officials accountable.

At least viewers were able to see what a Home Depot ad looks like over utter blackness. The terror.

“Look, like whatever team you like, but don’t disrespect the city! You gotta be better than that!”
- Some idiot on Philadelphia radio tomorrow, probably.

“That guy, the one who’s huge and totally ripped and considered a great athlete by NBA standards, that’s the dude I’m gonna pick a fight with!”

I wonder if this scheme would also work for outfield and upper deck seats in baseball stadiums. If you’re sitting in those sections you generally don’t care about closeness anyway, so what’s the difference between row nosebleed+1 and nosebleed+5? Just let me sit in the closest empty The Poors seat so I can get drunk…

Or just put a bear in the stands. A bear will keep order!

That there is some quality, high-velocity, action-packed fisting.

Questions, in descending order of importance:

!!! this is nuts!! if deadspin has to stick to sports more now i demand this be one of the sports stuck to

Fistball?

I’m gonna get exposed to a flyover tonight and be asked to stand for the National Anthem even though I’m just there to watch a football game.

Trying to justify it by saying these are “industry-standard established ranges based on experience” is especially fucked-up, given the strength of their resumes. He had one movie screenwriting credit and one “story by” credit prior to Crazy Rich Asians. She’d been writing for television for two decades. It’s a flimsy…

How many correct calls must we endure before this horror is banished to hell, and we can go back to complaining about refs missing all the calls before being stalked and killed by deranged passionate fans after the game, like the soccer I remember?

Listen, that kid knew concussions were part of the deal when he signed the contract. He’s neck deep in orange slices and pizza parties, so what’s he got to complain about?

I’m not letting my kid get a Participation in Concussion Drills trophy, man. He’s gotta earn his Concussion Champion trophy.

Jesus christ. When the fuck did it become acceptable for adults to cheer at a 6 year old(?) getting a concussion? 

One of those kids is probably his.

You don’t make $30/hr. That is only if you are constantly booked, if you do 6-10 min. trips over three hours you will make $30 in a hour of work time, but it will have taken you 3 hours to work an hour. Their $30/hr booked rate is a useless stat unless you can work non-stop, which is impossible since you are never…

Wait, if people were acting like they were in a limo going to a movie premier, wouldn’t they want to sit in the back?