I hope Martese holds out for a better settlement than the UVa student who thought she was being held up at gunpoint but was, rather, being arrested for carrying a case of sparking water out of the supermarket that the VABC geniuses thought was something alcoholic. Elizabeth Daly was scared. Martese Johnson was injured…

I called a research librarian today, at a well-known Northeastern school known for primarily producing engineers. My questions were about the history of the family of one of their mid 20th century donors whose papers are lodged in their special collections.

This needs to be asked of Rosie Perez.

Yep. Josephus is potentially tainted, most other texts are at least a generation too late, and and the source of the Q Gospel has never been …

Dewey 001. I read every book on the shelf about the Loch Ness Monster, aliens, and Bigfoot before the age of 10. Weird that grown up me is such a goddamn skeptic about pretty much everything.

Meatus

That’s Orange Kitty (from the dumpster) in the front and TJ (chicken coop) in the back. Very different personalities but both wonderful.

Keep up the compliments and I’ll have to bust out the pictures of the kitties: one came from a chicken coop and the other came from a dumpster. Dumpster kitty is currently sitting behind me on my office chair meowing at me, seemingly complaining that I’m not in bed giving him treats where I should be at this hour.…

You should see this puppy’s two kitty brothers give him the wap-waps when he gets too close to their butthole. They’re all great friends.

When we got this girl, she had narrowly avoided being a euthanasia training dog (yes, that’s a thing). Now, she sleeps on the back of the couch like a kitty.

Here’s one of my two foster failures: he was with us for 10 days, we fell in love with him, then dutifully put him on the transport truck to another rescue. We cried for 12 hours straight and told them to bring him back. So after a round trip in a van, he hasn’t left our side since. That was a year ago yesterday. He’s…

Q: What would you call the guy who got busy with Miley’s hairdresser after this event?

That photographer should give McCoy lessons on finding the seam.

Good luck — let us know what happens. A decent floor manager will let you cut a compromise with the DJ (i.e. no current pop songs without your approval) in the hopes of keeping you happy and a decent DJ will know that a happy dancer is a dancer who ends up earning him/her higher tips at the end of the night. If you’re…

That’s tough. Can you tip/bribe the DJ not to fuck with your musical stash? Can you find a happy medium of 60s-80s stuff that might keep the mood the new ownership is trying to portrait while not losing your P1s? Some psychedelic Beatles or Chambers Brothers/Hendrix for the 60s? Pet Shop Boys/Cure/Depeche Mode for the…

Good luck. The road is long but worthwhile.

Whenever you tell him, he’s apt to be surprised. Might as well tell him at a good time for him to be surprised (and a good time to tell him it doesn’t make him any less loved/desired by you). But I’d think you should tell him.

My favorite role: the representative from the Union of Concerned Scientists. Way more fun than being Lesotho.

Don’t tell anyone, but once upon a time I was a strip club DJ. Well, sort of. I was a jock on an active rock station and I was broadcasting live from the strip club so often that I became part of the furniture. When I moved out of town, the only people that came to my going away party were a fellow DJ, my blind…

Thomas Jefferson is on the $2, or at least every one made since 1917. I guess if you want to be overly precise about it, he’s among the crowd at the signing of the Declaration of Independence on the back of the 1976 and later $2s, but so are 53 other dudes.