historyrhymes1
HistoryRhymes1
historyrhymes1

Coming home from his brother’s marching band competition, my 9 year old insisted on Subway. The new Korean BBQ should come with a side of Maalox.

My wife is an ER nurse and sees this sort of thing all the time. Largest thing found anally to date was a Fushigi ball.

ESPNU-Bris.

She was wise to desert the property, sounds like it’s a mecca for bad behavior.

Shouldn’t hearing about someone’s winning/losing poker hand be on this list?

I knew I could count on you.

Not true. Here’s a good piece on it from a guy who covered that campaign relentlessly both during and after the 2008 election:

It’s a shame his leadership has ended under a cloud.

If the Pope only had payos, that guy would have a mouthful of hair.

I’m going to use this space to humblebrag while sharing the story of the Dalai Lama making a joke. He has a weird leg-pulling sense of humor.

I don’t know if I’m amazed that pissing yourself in front of a crowd in 2nd grade is so common that my story didn’t rank or disappointed that the most embarrassing moment of my life wasn’t nearly as embarrassing as I thought.

At least the Phillies can go .500 and still meet their goal of a 100 loss season!

Just for funsies, here’s the main chunk of the letter President Jefferson wrote to a dissenter group, the Danbury Baptists, in 1802:

I bought my wife, an ER nurse, a custom-made superhero doll that looks like her from a Kickstarter campaign. Her superhero power is “intravenous excellence.”

Somewhere Marion Zimmer Bradley is regretting not thinking of this first.

Just to complete the picture in your head, there was also mustard and maple syrup involved.

We were both fine, but let’s just say the armadillo didn’t make it.

I’m with you. I once had an entire industrial sized box of cayenne pepper dumped on me in the shower in college. I started crying when my scalp started burning. I started squealing when the weaponized condiment turned my eyes aflame. I started yelping and sobbing when the liquified mace invaded my meatus. And the rest

Thanks, you’re welcome to it.

In second grade, a teacher at my school determined by outsized personality / slightly obnoxious behavior would translate well to a career in the theatre. She asked me to try out for a community theatre production of the musical Babes in Toyland. It was a Christmas show and called for lots of kid roles, and I was