As a Brit, I have 2 things to say:

1: Your political system is WAY fucked up.

2: You need to get on this socialised healthcare shit ASAP. It is GREAT. You are going to LOVE IT.

Nope. They are binding sandwiches, and not just legally.

could I still eat the sandwiches even if I didn't want the engagement ring?

That sandwich in that picture needs to get in my belly.

“You’ve been up for 15 minutes and you haven’t made me a sandwich?” Seriously, dude? Damnit, now I'm angry and I want a BLT.

Never forget. This was one of the best comedies on television. Fuck ABC for canceling it.

Simply, there is no god.

SNUGGLE IN A TENT. SNUGGLE IN A TENT.

He's tall and hot, she's young and famous. Everyone's a winner!

If I were in Dakota Fanning's shoes, I would date as many older male models as I can.

"RUN to your accounts and take down anything that makes it easy for your male friends to imagine you naked in your bedroom."

Who wears a bra with pajamas?

I just read the whole "letter" twice, and I have only one question:

How long do you think it took her to type that, given all the pearls she was clutching?

Because some of the girls weren't wearing bras! AND BOOBS ARE REALLY BAD.

When are pajamas ever really considered erotic? Especially the footie kind. No. Just no.

"Lizzie May, I would very much like to touch your hair."

I KNOW! That whole "See, white people ain't so bad, we let you go eventually!" smirk.

At least the George Washington house is with it enough to hire a slave roleplayer. A lot of landmark houses in the South just euphamistically refer to "servants' quarters", and let the slave quarters decay, so there is literally no visible sign left of the people whose work made all that you see possible.

"Did you answer a job advertisement in the paper?"