Hey oh! If there’s a more surefire way of getting laid than 2 for $20 at Applebee’s, I’ve never seen it.

Education and training aren’t just means to an end though. It’s personal enrichment for its own sake. Why is the ability to expand one’s horizons more trivial than, say, religion?

We are all going to die. Why should any of us bother with training and clubs and things? Yes we train to reach levels of success but we also train because getting better at things gives us satisfaction and purpose.

The really great thing is, you don’t have to be alone with a woman to take away her access to health care.

Which is hilarious, because Sarah Palin is only shitting on Kaep for attention.

The ony thing that really appalled me in that SI piece is that Sarah Fucking Palin described Kaep’s donation to Meals on Wheels as a publicity stunt. For crissakes. “You’re only helping the hungry for attention!” Ugh.

I admire Pence for coming up with this common sense solution to a very real problem.

Apply with both hands, but in a really weird way that creates almost no rotation.

“Just say the word, girl, I got you.”

99% sure he wouldn’t have done that to a dude.

***they didn’t beat the Warriors with ease, idk what i was even trying to say there

This is completely unfair. Deron, Jefferson, Korver, and Frye are an incredible unit together and I have the NBA 2K9 disc to prove it.

New rule: Umpires get zero. You get zero ejections a year where you get to send somebody packing for saying some wild shit to you. You can still eject a pitcher for headhunting, and if a player is delaying the game and continues to jaw after a warning, then you can toss him, but no more pretending you’re the big…

Honestly, did you also have an impossible time telling these two Chads apart? Jesus WEPT.

Rick Perry still hasn’t figured out what his job is, so it isn’t like this distracted him from not doing it.

Yes!! This is where the difference lies. Concepts like “Diversity” apply only to the inclusion of straight white men. Just like how “freedom of speech” only applies to speech that adheres to the conservative platform.

He looks 45.

I love how republicans tell the rest of us to grow up, but then they take time out of their super important jobs to weight in on a college election that doesn’t really matter.

The thing is if Mcintosh had been a “minority student,” then I doubt Rick Perry would have taken time out of his precious schedule to attack Brooks.

Just take the compliment!