That's just a nickname. His real name is Forsythe P. Jones.
He obviously doesn't go by that, though, because of the lack of alliteration.

Ethel frequently tried to hook up with Dilton after Jughead continually spurned her advances. What surprisingly well-built guy wearing glasses did they get to play the nerd?

Do they still come with the shard of gum?

As long as you're standing when you do so!

Yeap, there were no generic musical acts in the 20th century. None whatsoever.

What is this? A homeless shelter for gay and transgender ants?

Well, that's three. I think you've filled our quota for the day, 2016.
RIP. What an amazing actor and comedic talent.

It's okay, some of my best friends are fat men.

You're just jealous. No one loves you because you're tiny and you're made of meat.

I enjoyed it when I watched it, but have never felt a desire to ever watch it again.

But I already smell like grease and salt.

Hur? What, is he funny or something?

Because the studio thinks they can make money by doing so.

They're easy to tell apart. Chinese cities slant like this /, and Japanese cities slant like that \.

Way to grow!

They don't go light speed, they travel in Hyperspace. If they were traveling in real space, relativistic speeds would have caused havoc with aging.

*Jizz Hands*

They were independent clauses!

The billionaire paid for the legal fees. All he did was make it possible for this case to go to trial. It's not like he bribed the judge and the jury to find Gawker guilty.

Ackmena will calm them down.