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You're the guy that's into Stephen Sondheim, right?

For the triple stumper in the currency category with the clue along the lines of "Gautemala's currency beginning with the letter 'Q'", I blurted out "What is a Quatloo" without thinking.

Yeah, I'm trying to figure out what the upside is here. They've already made their decision to abort, so whatever his opinion is doesn't matter, so why bother telling him, which will just make everyone feel bad.

What the? Condoms have a failure rate of 15% under typical use, and yet Dan still recommends in every single article to hire a sex worker? Holy crap, if that isn't a reason to stay as far away from a prostitute, I don't know what is.

You know though, say what you will about Arthur, but he certainly got people talking. I just realized I can't even remember then name of the lady who just went on the second longest winning streak of all time. She was just that boring in comparison to Arthur.

Were people really upset that he took interviews while his run was still on the air? I thought people disliked him because of his brash competitive attitude, and his use of the Forrest bounce technique.

Yeah, I could not stand having to listen to her talk, so it was a just as well that she hardly had control of the board.

*Matt Damon cries in the corner.*

Look you little shit, you want to talk back to me?

Remember the time when you found your Macho Man sleeping and you couldn't wake him up? We told you he was extra tired from all of the piledrivers he had done the day before, and he just needed to rest for a bit.

I… uhhh … I have some bad news for you.

Yes, my firstborn will inherit the mantle of "HeroBoy" when I am no longer fit to carry the burden.

Remember how two weeks after the Boston bombings, numerous movies about the event were announced? How well did that work out?

They don't want to look like freaks. They should just wear muumuus.

Death is a part of baseball.

They're called fingers, but I've never seen them fing. Oh, there they go.

What a crazy story. There's no Albuquerque Isotopes. It's the Springfield Isotopes.

Hey, don't get upset. We can hash it out.

How about concept bands? Because Man…or Astro Man? wins hands down.