With its full name on its tee shirt.

Clothing with names is the #1 thing that prevents us for returning it or consigning it

“Clothing with names is the #1 thing that leads to kidnapping”

I would. Hard!

In my perfect world, the woman who lets her kids lick the table would be seated immediately after the woman who changes her baby on the table.

STFU! I'm here for crazy customer stories, and I couldn't care less about The Great Racist Witch Hunt you seem to be participating in.

Is there a way to have the comments of those that have the hate boner for you not be the main ones we see? I usually love the comment section of BCO because I love swapping "war stories," this is kinda ruining my boner.

I thoroughly enjoyed this edition of BCO and was going to write something pertinent to the post, but after reading the comments I'm positive it would be hijacked by some idiot about something that has nothing to do with this blog. Keep up the good work and looking forward to next Monday.

C.A. Pinkham,

So I would just like to put this out in the world, BCO has made me a better diner and that makes me proud. On Friday I was out with friends, attending a Feminist/We Hate Men (not really, but some people think that's what the word means...) book reading. Afterward, giddy we went to a bar next door and made lots of…

NO LIFE & STYLE. This is not “the Queen Mum”, this is the actual QUEEN OF ENGLAND, ELIZABETH II. “The Queen Mum” was mother, who was also named Elizabeth; the nickname was supposed to help avoid this confusion but apparently it’s ineffective on stupid American tabloids.

nope, stop, I will leave. Worst one yet.

Sonic is actually a completely different shitty animal compared to other fast food places. Carhops are tipped employees, at least in my crappy town. My kid worked there for a year.

*bows* I live to serve!

Kitchenette shirt idea: ASK ME ABOUT FREE POPCORN with a Blue Crustacean logo on the back.

And these types of stories explain why, when I left a $20 tip on a $50 meal, the waitress ran out the door after me to make sure I hadn't made a mistake in leaving a $20. No mistake hon. You ran your ass off for me, catered to my insane food allergies and made sure I didn't get sick, and laughed at my mom's lame…

I wonder if anyone ever comes here and is like "Oh my god, that was me."

Once on the El in Chicago, I tried to clench my jaw and hold the vomit in once when I was badly hungover and realized I couldn’t keep from throwing up. The result was that the vomit came out my nose. Not a fun morning.

I love running, but on occasion I get runners gut (if you are unfamiliar with runners gut, it is the incredible need to take a shit RIGHT NOW that you can get from increased blood flow to your intestines, and jiggling during a long run. It is the reason why that picture of a marathon runner with diarrhea running down…

Oh my gosh I’m actually here when a Pissing Contest goes up! And I have a story! The fates have aligned!

Okay, so, I was on a field trip, I was 10 years old, we were on a bus, I get bus sick. So, obviously, I threw up on the bus on a field trip aged 10. Boring story. EXCEPT! I _knew_ I was going to get sick, and when I…