Leonardo DiCaprio winning that Oscar was the opening of the seventh seal of the apocalypse, I’m telling you.

It’s like every person you hate assembling to form an Asshole Voltron.

We should go and take pictures of it and post it all over social media. I would enjoy doing that.

There is only one person to blame to Donald Trump’s victory and that is Hillary Clinton.

“Thanks for the keys to the country, media. You’re fired.”

Eh, TOL has its moments, but Darkness on the Edge of Town is his true masterpiece. So much ander, grace loneliness and longing on that one. He managed to avoid being a target of Punk ire, and stay relevant.

The dark part of my soul wants either Trump or Clinton to win... and then watch the world burn and show those who hold their nose and voted for them how truly awful whichever one of them wins is.

You can’t say that here. Leaks about Hillary Clinton cheating during debates and colluding with the DNC are tainted...Trump leaks are sacrosanct.

i like beyonce (have forever, saw destiny’s child in concert three times as a kid) but is anyone else totally exhausted by stan culture? the internet acting like she is the greatest thing in the history of the world and completely above reproach tires me out(the amount of ‘woke’ people i saw defending her for that…

No.

i always have headphones plugged in for that reason now.

Maybe she was hungover? Don’t know why we care about the detail so much.

Tomato soup with a side of grilled cheese sandwich

Wasn’t he in a movie once?

Fucking good. She should resign. It’s appalling that she leaked the questions from CNN, or that she even got them in the first place. And setting aside how stupid it was to leak things in general, she should at least have had the damn tradecraft to do it over the phone and not in a fucking email. And also, apparently…

Should have been Bern. Look what the DNC and Clintonites have done.

Here’s my theory on the Olsens and their taste for older men: Men closer to their own ages have all this baggage from growing up with them on tv. Full House and the Olsen twins barely registered for those of us over a certain age (say 50), so they can date men that age and there’s no icky “I had a crush on you or…

I say we send all the tissue - forevermore - to Governor Abbot - even when he loses office. By mail. Snail mail. Slowest possible. No ice packs.

I think I will start mailing all of my pads to Catholic hospitals in Texas, with a note that I am quite sure that they contain the remains of a miscarriage.