Cause you're a lint ball and you know it

Would have been far more effective in removing the lint had he started from the bottom.

I sincerely hope he makes a quick, full recovery. Basketball is absolutely better with him involved. I love every single clip of a player or coach ragging on his outfits.

I think I speak for everyone here in the comment section when I say, "Get well soon, Craig."

Well, besides my mom calling out my little league coaches for not starting me in a LONG ARTICLE PUBLISHED IN OUR TOWN NEWSPAPER I really don't have any. Too bad.

Ok, I think I have a unique perspective on what's going on here...

"Big Girl, I don't care what you are. You can be black, white, blue, purple, whatever." -Chris Brown

Let it be known that the great Jim Cooke actually did two illustrations for this piece; we swapped out lead questions at the last minute. Here then was the initial art, inspired by the surviving-on-condiments Q; cower in the face of its majesty.

He claims he's being persecuted for being a really good lover...

your comment smells like Axe

I want to apologize for making this joke. So many people are making similar jokes and as such, I am only now realizing my mistake. Sorry, world, for this bad joke.

I like how Amanda Bynes is on vacation from literally nothing.

Agreed. You might bother the people in front of you in that packed baseball stadium. This is a Mets game, not a goddamn day at the beach. While you're at it, quit reading the program. They're not playing the game on paper, you fucking dipshit. They're playing it on the field. Also, wipe that stupid smile off your…

Well me too, I guess — but when I get milfed I don't go complaining to the press about it.

"I hope this serves as a lesson to All-Americans. Whoops. I mean, all Americans."

Drew's just mad because his own brand was a failure and people mistakenly referred to him as Big Daddy Balls.

Darren Rovell is the kind of person that uses the word "synergy" unironically