Also, there was already an awesome live-action Cinderella movie and it was called Ever After and no matter how delightfully insane this cast is EVER AFTER WILL ALWAYS BE FIRST IN MY HEART.

I save puppies! I have fostered 17 puppies who were on the kill list at shelters. There's no article about me. But here's one of my babies!

Words cannot express how much I love Shel Silverstein. At least not words as good as his.

When the lady and I get this business of baby-making taken care of, I guarantee we'll be doing the same thing. Unless the little one is a absolute banshee... then I might think twice about it. That's the thing, all these babies I've seen at Slow Bar, Apex, Saraveza, St Johns Food Pod etc. are so freakin' chill, that…

It was interesting to see after moving to Portland (OR), particularly on the East Side where all the happy hipster families roam, any bar is fair game for a baby in tow. I've had a couple instances where this has been bothersome (fierce crying) but for the most part, it's pretty chill and kind of strangely cool. Folks…

It's kind of hard to explain but it's there. (Non-white people, I'm sorry to make this all about me and my extra-special white ethnic minority problems for a second. I just want to speak from experience.) "All-American" is always used as praise, and it's never used to describe people like my family (Ashkenazi Jews; go…

Urban dictionary isn't a real source, you know....it's just as stereotypical and judgmental as the worst of the internet.

This is like when your friend starts dating a total lame-o and you don't want to say anything because it will turn into this huge "thing" if they end up, like, getting married or whatever, but you're desperately trying to make a telepathic connection with her to let her know she's like 5 status points above him and…

Pic or it didn't happen. This is eerily similar to a story from last year.

Ugh, last year my husband was working late when these came out. When he got home, I was under a blanket with my laptop and cat in the dark. He took away my laptop and we watched The Jerk until I was feeling better. WORTH IT.

Put this together with the article about a woman being harassed at a hospital for NOT breastfeeding, and you begin to wonder if we live in a world where all women are disrespected, or is it only mothers that are treated with contempt? Breastfeed or don't breastfeed -either way you will be reviled.

This country needs to seriously get over their obsession with breasts.

Anyone remember this?

"Why don't women just tell us when they're not interested????" -Reddit

Mark, I like you. I think your columns are funny and well-written. But can you not with this? This is blatant click-bait by the Daily Mail to get people frothing about how ugly this woman is, how dare she think otherwise!!!!1!!1!! Can you not feed that?

I am still hoping Emma Carmichael turns the ship around. When Cosmopolitan's doing more to advance feminism, it's time to rethink your priorities.

What is this headline and article, i can't even?

Callie, noooo! I mean, congrats! But I'll miss your Dirt Bags, they are my favourite morning coffee-reading ever ever.

In France, it's called a Ne Rien with cheese

WHERE'S THE BEEF, KATE DRIES? WHERE?