It’s not the notion of “fairness” being drilled into our brain by a commie school system, it’s that our unregulated all-American variation on capitalism has spiraled out of control to the point where the very existence of certain levels of income directly cause poverty and struggle at a rate unheard of in any other…

“Why, that’s just American history! What, you dumb sjw libruls want to erase HISTORY?”

In the end, it turns out that Cory Booker was really Loki.

It’s like eBaums World for a new generation

He doesn’t seem like a great dude, but we can simultaneously believe that the allegations about him are likely true and that his whole public fall from grace was likely engineered by GOP operatives, right? I feel like splinter and other similar outlets really bury that part in sexual bad man!!!! stories. Like Franken.…

Internet businesses have a maximum success period of 10-15 minutes.

It doesn’t make sense to manufacture this shit in America for a variety of reasons, so this was p. much equivalent to the Republican devotion to reigniting American coal mining in spite of all math to the contrary. Also, why do we want to bring the factories over from China that are surrounded by nets because so many…

The Democrats attacks on the GOPs counter-proposal, the “Restoring Faith in American Voting Act” is appalling partisanship. Sure, the entire content of the proposed bill is just one loose-leaf page with “no blacks” scrawled hastily on it, but they’re not approaching with the tradition of respect that Congress is…

Oh my god I hate the Democrats and don’t want to vote for one.

Journalists totally didn’t get his PhD level dissertation on Ching Chong chinamen 

What the world needs now is more cowardly centrism. Surely, taking no strong stance and reporting only in mealy-mouthed neutrality will reel in the readership.

I can wait until the sleuths on 4Chan and Reddit uncover this groups connection to Soros and the Clinton Foundation.

NOBODY READ THE ARTICLE ABOUT MAKING MY LAWYER LIE TO CONGRESS! READ A BUNCH OF IDIOT ANALYSIS OF THIS NEW NORTH KOREA MEETING THAT WILL NOT MENTION OBSTRUCTION OF JUSTICE!

I can think of at least one much stronger reason that modern Republicans would be reluctant to kill baby Hitler.

Score another win for the new millennium: Our robber barrons are robbier than the ones for whom the term was coined! Look at that beautiful slope in the 1980s. You can literally feel the Reaganomics trickling down our economy!

Rudy has been undergoing a slow-paced version of the flesh melting from the end of Raiders for the last two years. Maybe he has cataracts and the light works on a longer timeline if you can’t see it directly. Who’s to say. All I know is that dude’s flesh is definitely falling off the bone like a delicious hank of bbq.

Even though Michael Cohen isn’t the source of this story, you can’t believe it, because Michael Cohen is a known liar and it is therefore impossible that Trump hired him to lie.

“It would disproportionately benefit our opponents if we were unable to continue cheating.”

Why is (((Rep. Nadler))) putting his name in the 3 parentheses that Internet racists use when they talk about Jews?