You would prefer it, but you would be wrong. America is a beautiful crazy quilt! And Puerto Rico is one of its loveliest patches! Kandy Ho and April Carrion are as American as you and I, but without some voting representation.

You're not very bright, are you? At least Katya knows how to spell "gagging."

It's a personal choice. Can't have anything to do with her persona; otherwise the disembodied spirits of Mary Astor and Carol Lombard would like to have a word with her.

You can actually do this with tablets.

After reflecting for a couple of days, she maybe could have fashioned the bloody barbed wire into a headdress, which would have given it a glam edge to contrast with the shredded jail jumpsuit.

Snatch Game is improv, so it's a showcase for the quick-witted queens. Katya will probably nail it, because she's the smartest one (as long as she doesn't choke, dammit). Max might do well thanks to her theatre background. Ginger is really funny with characters — her Michelle was hysterical.

It's not a fake British accent; it's a Mid-Atlantic accent, which was used by actors in the '30s and '40s. Except for Katharine Hepburn, who just used her own old-school New England accent.

The gray wig was perfect for this look, because she was Miss Havisham in a '30s Universal horror flick. Besides, blonde hair looks gray in B&W. I love how she melds the runway challenges with her aesthetic. Case in point: Her resort of choice was Warm Springs, Ga.

April may not be much of an actress, but she is adorable. She has a Puerto Rican cooking show on YouTube!

Track Of the Cat, with Teresa Wright and Robert Mitchum, directed by Wild Bill Wellman. Excellent '50s Western set in the mountains.

Utz chips are good, but Herr's Old Bay chips are better than Utz's.

Don't worry, kid. You didn't miss anything.

Ex-bartender here. The muddled fruit was just what the old fashioned had (d)evolved to. Bartending 20 years ago was much simpler.

What he said! That movie is off-the-hook weird.

Hey now! Reagan was hot back in his movie days! But not much of an actor. He was like the Ryan Reynolds of the '40s.

Or the statue of Nathan Bedford Forrest just outside Nashville.

I'm really looking forward to this. I've only read Wolf Hall, but it was fantastic. I've been fascinated with Anne Boleyn since I saw Anne of the Thousand Days as a kid. To humanize Cromwell for me is a heroic feat.

Thanks, Obama!

I loved Ernest: "Say bay-bee!"

When a coin in the coffer rings, a soul from Purgatory springs!