A lot of Florida waters have alligators—they take people’s dogs and cats if they get too close to the water. Truly, Florida might be the Hellmouth.

ok sure. but also, it’s florida. there’s gators everywhere.

I agree, I feel horribly for this family. I’m from California and go to Disneyland a lot. If I traveled to Florida it wouldn’t even occur to me that a lake within the park could have alligators unless there was a sign saying so. I mean you can’t swim in the rivers of America at Disneyland and signs saying so, but it…

Sticking your feet in water is not swimming.

Focusing everything around booze creates a huge barrier to recovering addicts, religious abstainers, and voluntary non-drinkers. If you’re so dependent on alcohol to socialize, you’re willing to alienate people for it, maybe you need to read this article a second time.

Everything about this woman is boring. I can’t even say she’s vanilla, because vanilla is actually delicious.

MY MAID OF HONOR WAS A LENTIL!

AND OBVIOUSLY RUPAUL

EAT SHIT (if they served shit at Fresh Choice, it would only be the finest organic shit and you could customize it with whatever buffet fare you wanted because it’s a restaurant for “the people”)

FUCK YOU TOO MAN

I love Portia, but Milania would take her out in cold blood.

Highlight of my morning.

Wolford Velvet De Luxe 66 (Retail for $45)

Wolford Velvet De Luxe 66 (Retail for $45)