I was confused. Thanks for the clarification. But now I’m sad, because I was reading quotes in Garry Marshall’s voice and it was delightful.

Wear a C and started wearing a bralette after I had my gallbladder out, because the wires wanted to dig into my incision every time I sat down. Now I can’t make myself switch back and like to pretend that my tits look more like comic book tits now - in a weird, slightly natural and pendulous way.

Yeah but I just want to go on record that I too am insanely fucking talented.

No shit, I love, love, love dogs, but I don’t have the time or attention to devote to more than two - and I can only handle two because I live alone and have no kids or anything. It’s just like the Duggars having 20 kids that all raise each other - they don’t love children, they are collecting brownie points from…

I’m passing judgement. If your pants fail to cover less than half of your ass, I find it difficult to qualify them as pants. If they are cinched to remain at a place just below said ass, they aren’t pants, they are leg warmers. At least with those ugly harem pants guys were wearing for a while, they could achieve the…

I just cried watching it. I mean, I have seen it before, but not for a long time. All things considered, what else could he say at that moment?

Wow!

I can’t stop thinking it’s an Amy Schumer skit where she plays the tall one.

What about if you are charming and beautiful in person but extremely un-photogenic? Could I build mine around only being seen in person and not existing it print or film? I mean, I didn’t write a book, but I’m talking mystique building in general.

If there really is a Reba McIntyre section of Dillards, I want to shop it immediately. Wait.......what is Dillards? I’m thinking it’s like Sporting Goods and hunting shit, but it might be a department store. If it’s a department store, I retract.

Yeah, I have lots of friends that are vegan in the sense that they will not eat meat or dairy unless they come from a familiar source.

I hate that he wants people that look like men and believe they are men to be in my bathroom. Intent is everything with me. If you are living your life as a woman, no matter what parts you were born with, I’m happy to share.

Also, I missed my best friend’s wedding in the Virgin Islands.

The meanest celebrity I ever met was Jon Favreau. He came in the pet store where I worked and because I couldn’t tell him what filter to buy for his aquarium (we only had supplies for the aquarium systems that we sold - it was a very small store with a smaller fish area) he totally shamed and berated me in front of…

My brother has been told he looks like Ben Affleck since Armageddon came out. At the store recently with his 2 year old daughter, she pointed at a magazine and chanted, “Daddy, Daddy, look Daddy!” They turned to find that she had identified a tabloid cover of Ben as her father. My brother puffs up his chest and says…

I feel like they were best friends who lived next door to each other growing up, but in junior high, his parents moved to the better part of town and he got into sports and they just lost touch. And now he’s this buff, popular quarterback and she’s in the glee club and it just doesn’t work anymore.

Weirdly, I have lived next to the same single old woman (horrible bitch...horrible) for like 10 years and have watched her throw away 3 vacuums. Her yard is immaculate (she hates me because I won’t mow my lawn every single week) so I assume her house is the same, but it’s about the same as mine, about 750 square feet,…

I just can’t wait till we move on to the one piece silver jumpsuit. If all I had to worry about was hair, makeup and accessories, my life would be so much easier.

It’s shitty that she worked in an industry that allowed that sort of shit - not that I am blaming her for choosing to her own career or anything. Everyone should feel safe where they work if nothing else.

I think I have the best family!