Painter of a Thousand Perils!

She’s from Stony Brook goddamn Long Island; there’s no way that’s her real accent.

Of all of Bruce’s sons, you assume his one biological son is the lead?

Ooof

Funny, I thought the opposite when he was on Titans; there’s no way that guy’s in his early twenties. That could be because the casting on that show is weird, since his partner, Dove, is played by an actress I recently saw playing a mom.

David Lowery of Cracker and Camper Van Beethoven has a lot of tweets on the subject.

My soon-to-be ex-wife kicks the bathmat away when she gets out of the shower and lays down a towel because she doesn’t understand the point of bathmats.

If you're available, I would like to propose to you.

Because dairy and egg production create just as much animal suffering and cruelty as steak and wings.

Shit, I forgot to eat meat the last fifteen years.

Seeing that none of these come without animal products reminds me of a few vegan jokes:

The target in the novel is not credit card companies; they’re museums. The idea is that destroying them frees modern people from the burden of living up to their ancestors.

Durden and Project Mayhem’s goal in the novel is also different; they’re destroying museums so modern people aren’t beholden to previous generations and can be free to create without that hovering over them.

The rumor was that he did a heavy rewrite of the script and Singer kept two lines-- the toad one and Wolverine calling Cyclops a dick.

Russell Crowe is playing Zeus in the next Thor movie, which also has Christian Bale as Gor, the God Butcher; Marvel's already started poaching the DCEU talent.

How the hell is Jaws not on this list?

Back to the Future is perfect in how fucking racist it is.

Wait, I came up with a worse/better idea.

I hate that my brain works this way, but here we go:

Agnostics “don’t know” if there’s a god— which is literally every person on the planet. Atheists believe there’s no god. You’re likely thinking of antitheists.