Everyone knows you have to say the comma out loud!

I did my time as an accessibility professional. I have heard of and seen lots of different types of assistance animals, but never a “lawyer dog.” Because there’s no such fucking thing. Unless the Louisiana Supreme Court have been huffing and think Mr. Peabody is a real dog.

Did I miss the part of the video where they shot her a bunch of times?

I’m guessing those Blue Lives Matters assholes are going to be conflicted as all hell. On the one hand, they’re going to argue that the drunk chick had it coming. On the other, black guy. Truly a Sophie’s choice situation for them.

I don’t know what I was expecting to happen... but it wasn’t that.

Excuse me, but she has a name: It’s the Waitress.

But only one of them has crusts stuffed with disgust- nevermind.

I like to eat racists. What do I do

Don’t eat Papa John’s. He’s still a racist, but he just wants to be less overt about it. It’s not for nothing that Nazi numbnuts chose his pizza

I thought the alt-right already had an official greasy, orange pile of garbage that makes your stomach cramp just by looking at it

She. Said. What. She. Said.

Before one of y’all thin-skinned, pasty faces asks why I made this about race: BECAUSE REPRESENTATION MATTERS, BITCH.

“Rowe says the school threatened to remove her from campus if she was caught talking about what happened to her.”

I don’t get those charges. Surely somewhere in the definitions of assault or other sorts of endangering or doing harm to another person there is room for deliberate use of your own bodily excretions to attempt to harm another person.

class B misdemeanors

The whole police report sounds like when I tried to make my high school papers sound more important with a thesaurus..

I just threw up from the camera work.

It’s always reassuring when someone tells me “not worry about the gun.”