I love this Angelina+Jack Black friendship more than life itself.

If my words were misplaced.

Misplaced his words? Did he accidentally leave them in his other pants, or were they previously stored up his butt and he forgot that they usually only come out when he’s not in public?

I don’t really mind it so much... except she is clearly lying because cats don’t wear makeup or get piercings. I know this because every time I have tried to do a smoky eye on my cats, they scratch me.

Aw, jeez, come on. I identify with sloths, but I’m not Rachel Dolezaling myself into a sloth, the way this chick is into a cat.

chronic tardiness is *totally* cross platform.

Me too, bar my breasts are larger. Did you also do a little happy dance at seeing someone a similar size & shape as you being used to sell swimwear *and* looking damn fine doing it?

As a cat, I think of myself as hate based.

Normal

I’d be mad if I paid for first class and got moved to coach too.