With as retarded of a list of wants as he has, this is the only suitable option.

“He understands what the move means and why we did it. I don’t know how it will play out, but he’s got family and community reasons to be here. There is mutual desire if things continue to check out to continue the relationship.”

The longer judges are on the bench, the taller the bench feels. “People? What are people? NEXT CASE."

“It is impossible to talk about alcohol and not talk about sex.”

...I think you might want to see a podiatrist.

Stopped reading at ‘Unfrosted’.

And now he’s going to be disqualified for having the runs.

Let’s Remember Some Bloggers

I recently met a vegan Crosfitter who answered the age-old question.

You clearly know nothing about the history of that logo. But, sure, racist.

I am strongly in favor of “Las Vegas Ice Weasels”. Strongly.

Sounds like a great way to waste your drugs on a couple that isn’t dtf. Take that mess over to The Cuck.

And it begins poorly. And the middle is done poorly. Thank God for Sgt Debbie Callahan.

Good enough to eat while riding a bicycle, good enough to eat while driving a car. 250 calories with protein and caffeine will keep you going for a while.

Dear old guy,

Can we stop using “pussy” as a word to mean weak though? My vagina has birthed three god damn kids.

That’s because no one who uses Excel has an important job.
I use excel every day. Also...notice what I’m doing right now.

Last time a Raptor played for the US Olympic team in the number 9 jersey this happened..

In a show of solidarity with everyone in North Carolina who is unsure which bathroom they are legally allowed to use, Governor Pat McCrory just shit his pants.

Bat Flip or get the fuck out.