You had one fucking job. Keep him alive to stand trial so everyone else goes down with him.

Note to the guards: Suicide watch does not mean, “watch someone commit suicide.”

Exhibit #1,921 for why I will never, ever live in Philly again.

No, that’s a bitch move.  

Betty is a treasure to be shared in any form

This is the correct take.

If they can co-opt the “ok,” sign. We can use Betty.

Maybe Its just my focus, but the more I stare at that C8, the Greener it becomes. I can see that it’s yellow, but there’s some Green in there somewhere. Its ugly anyway. 

“Your an idiot” is just...*chef’s kiss*

America’s flaming “gateway to hell” is called Phoenix 

Yes the universal uniter....calling someone you don’t know an idiot multiple times. I think that’s how my Grandparents met actually. Or no I’m sorry, those were their wedding vows.

*You’re

Solid critique from a guy with [checks history] all of one comment.

Tin soldiers and Trump’s comin’

You can actually recover from getting slammed head first into the ground.

You should have smacked her for talking during the anthem. 

I was walking to my seat at Camden Yards, hat on, toddler and diaper bag in hands and the anthem started playing. Before I could let out a groan, this old Fox News patriot hag immediately smacked me on the back of the head and told me how offended she was that I wouldn’t remove my hat. She then proceeded to tell me…

Not for nothing, national anthems are pretty ridiculous in the first place. Having to stand and honor it ahead of every sporting event (or say the pledge of allegiance before a meeting) is downright bizarre. 

but he is white

This guy clearly violated the terms of parole and they let him out without bail?  At the very least this should trigger a new sentence hearing for his prior offense.