BRB, gonna make some ‘murderer’ pins. And then if a man still comes home with me and I murder him it’ll be his fault, right? I mean - I advertised. I don’t have to go to prison now?

We’re the ones who need asylum from her.

Don’t take a job as an executioner then. Don't like the changes to your job? Can't in good conscience do them? Step the fuck down.

You get the sense from looking at her face that she believes she is the bravest warrior to ever “warry”

Let me think. . . let me think. . . If I had defied a court order what would happen to me. Hold on. . . it’s coming to me. . . almost there. . .

Oh, the Supreme Court? The Supreme Court that ruled that gay marriage was legal? That Supreme Court? Good luck with that, you ignorant fuck.

The fuck out of here with this mess.

Here is my favorite passage from her post:

Trump is holding a mirror up to America. But instead of being horrified of what they’re seeing, these folks are saying. “Yeah! That’s a good look!”

That’s not an americano by that point though. It’s totally fair to not want more water than what comes from melted ice, but an americano is by definition espresso mixed with water.

Except it only involves them fucking over women, and not anyone else. Have you ever been conscripted into donating a kidney, or even blood, against your will? No? Well maybe you should be, because that shit saves literal lives. Where are the so-called “pro-life” people on this subject? Think of all the lives that…

I’m going to go ahead and assume you’ve never worked a customer service job before.

Sometimes I feel like the crazy over the top custom drinks are not because the person actually really likes that drink but because they like to be dominant over the baristas. There is this attitude that just comes with it that really bothers me. I have said stuff to people in line being shitty to the baristas because…

douche freighter has a nice ring to it

You can’t grow a uterus back, dummy. They’re not arms.

you really shouldn’t be operating a segway while stoned anyway

I’d rather have my uterus grow back and get another hysterectomy, but while awake this time.

Thank god those poor fragile men have someone speaking out for them!

The baby was delivered by planned C Section, precisely because labour and childbirth would have been so physically dangerous. That poor little girl.

That’s an emotionally appealing solution, but the smallest amount of thinking and it becomes clear how unfair it would be to punish good civil servants for the actions of their corrupt colleagues.