Oh my! I did not need that visual and yet, here it is.

I don’t think Jezebel is for you, son.

And over dog poop specifically, it should be a fecal fracas.

Yup. Open concept is less about getting to be social and more about getting to not have people in your way. Cause let’s be honest, someone always tries to talk to you while you’re in the kitchen.

Eh, to each their own. I like an open kitchen enough I will gladly strong arm my guests out of there if they’re doing something inappropriate. The benefit of being able to socialize and work in the kitchen while having everyone on the opposite side of the counter and out of my way far outweighs the drawback of a…

If you have a guest trying to wash dishes they’re either trying to be nice to you or escape from whatever is happening in the living room. So let them, or entertain them better. Either way, it’s not something that’s unique to open concept, let’s be honest.

Your last point about open concept advantages is what makes me prefer them over the alternative. Being able to kick people the fuck out of my kitchen area while still being able to talk to them is soooo valuable to me. I get to be social while also not having someone right in my way, which is invariably what happens…

Third option: the contour dildo.

Why wait? Bump Fallon and give her the Tonight Show.

“Trust him like a brother.”
“Making forts under covers.”
“Call it what you want.”

HOLD UP.

A previous boyfriend was Tom Hiddleston, who looks like a centuries-old vampire so... no?

Better, and although not more romantic, it would make their relationship way more believable.

The only true act of customer service Twitter has done.

Also, if she said, “If you want to hire a racist, you do you” would that get her in less trouble than saying “don’t hire this guy?”

Scare tactics, press, and precedent?

I did the calculations, and Elie spending $16K on this is like my paying my six year old niece a penny for a commissioned portrait of my cat.

Exactly. And when allies go “Uh oh, you’ve given them a reason to ruffle their feathers! Shouldn’t have done that!” they give the power back to the oppressors to silence the oppressed. The allies in fact become a kind of oppressor.

Abortion, Parker said, was a “civil conflict between humanity and convenience,” like slavery.

Why the fuck are stupid male politicians making legislation about women’s bodies???!?