Yep, I sat on a pen when I was about 7. Have Phoebe Buffay's "WHOLE WORLD" tatt on my ass to this day.

My Motorola Mini knows when I'm driving and reads/replies to texts for me. Unfortunately, it doesn't work through my Bluetooth. You can set it to be "always listening" but this is a battery drain.

Regular foam ear plugs hurt my ears. These are strong enough to drown out my husband's snoring, and are just enough for hotels so you could hear a fire alarm (or break in.)

Me too. Trazodone makes me hella hung over, but Ambien is my friend.

Yeah, but he's saying it's happening ALL THE TIME. No stop, constant fuck fest. It's just weird he knows so much about his parents sex life. If they are that freaky, they are probably getting it on in his bed when he's gone, so he should chill—or just move out.

"...they do it when I'm gone or at night." THEN HOW DOES HE KNOW? Are they producing so much baby batter it is floating on the top?

Behold the fierce stiff-leg-hop of the tiny warrior!

She does "Irreplaceable" too. Awesome!

"For the Basic Bitch in all of us." There, I fixed her tag line.

I got a robo-call from Giant in Maryland. I have been non-stop eating them for the last two weeks, because yummy fruit. I feel fine, but I threw the last two away. Sad face.

Excellent reference article. Evernoted!

"Eve was born"? Dude, pick a side.

I'm an old, but I think unsolicited dick pics are a form of sexual battery. Like flashing, they should be outlawed.

The paper lets the book cover stay closed. Anything thicker, and the end book won't be flush.

Very cool. I'm judging his reading selection, though.

I used to read the online diary of a man who was obsessed with Jennifer Garner, and he used the "wife by law" thing, and a bunch of bizarre biblical and Greek mythology references. He was convinced they were gods sent to rule the world together. He wrote that he was going to fulfill his destiny and be with her, then…

I agree she was prettier before.

Is she a drug addict? Because otherwise, how? Why? Ugh.

Yeah, it was pretty gross. Already or (eww!) previously occupied is bad enough, being surprised in the shower is even worse.

In addition to the good reasons listed already, this is a bad idea in discount hotels. I worked the front desk in these through college and we had some housekeeping staff who were already using those rooms to make extra money. The chance of your room being occupied or entered while you are in there is pretty high, as…