Total milf.

Some seriously underrated deep Paxton cuts: the greatest asshole older brother ever in Weird Science, his beautifully deep, intense and tricky movie Frailty, and his scene-stealing comedy in Edge of Tomorrow.

Fuck compete. Stop trying to make fetch happen.

Dear Deadspin - I like sports, I like video games. Your esports coverage can go fuck itself.it may be a slow news day, but again, go fuck yourselves.

It’s called potty-style.

I heard Spanos and his son on the radio the other day talking about how excited they were about coming to this new “market.” They literally used that words dozens of times like some drunken marketing interns instead of ever calling LA a city or town.

So you’re pro-income disparity now? And you haven’t published a bubble-burst article in awhile either. Stop cherry picking your arguments and pretending that you know how to fix money, Hamno.

Cubans a dumb piece of shit with a garbage sense of conduct.

Fucking bravo.

I wanna say that’s kinda from the Third Man? You still get the Pulitzer o’ the day for Internet Wit.  

And holy shit, Gang saves the Day is at the bottom of your list when it’s essentially a flawless series finale.

Mac Bangs Dennis’ Mom (your 110 / my 1) is downright Shakespearean in its fiendish design of incestual revenge.

If 2 of your kids are freezing to death, yeah, you should probably spend $20/each to keep them alive. That would not be spoiling them.

This is the right answer.

Uh, you shoulda listened to your coach - If you just had fun, you wouldn’t have been sweating losing and getting your ass handed to you. My football team sucked something awful, but I remember with glory all my little hits, catches and runs along the way quite fondly.

Jim Rome sucks. If he announces, I swear I’ll stop torrenting UFC.

This just in: Ugly man hates pretty man.

That no call on the “tripping” was also spiritually correct. When you’re a giant stick doofus running away from the basket, and your frail clown feet brush against a real man’s sneaker... then you deserve to be a traitorous sissy coward who gets to fail with a bunch of 3-1 lead-blowing losers.

Best player with a top-5 sidekick.

“Cum fritters” made me barf.