My nephew Washing Machine makes weird noises and is clearly unbalanced.

I’ve lived most of adult life with the firm hypothesis that all men with large neck tattoos are all douche bags.

His lawyers successfully got the court to use his birth name during the trial, precisely because they knew the jurors would react the same way as you.

I think it’s the “machine” part. My cousin, Sex Machine, is also a scumbag.

If I were the judge it’d be excruciating to have to say “Mr. Machine” so many times without visibly rolling my eyes.

I hope it turns into a short sentence.

36 years in prison is some alpha male shit brooooooooo!!!!

at least in prison he’ll be safe from the 20 million women that want to kick his fucking ass

It must be something with the name. I have an acquaintance named War Machine and he is always in trouble as well. Weird.

Good fucking riddance.

What dumbasses.... Although I suppose we should consider ourselves lucky that they didn’t try to ‘clarify’ the issue by demanding to ‘verify’ she was a girl, if you catch my drift... And lets be honest, it isn’t at all implausible for this story have taken that kind of dark turn.

Good job grown ups.

i cant help but think red, white and blue apathy plays a part as well.

Cash Freeman is an all time great names. I dunno if this blog participates in/contributes to the Great Names bracket they have at deadspin, but it should be submitted.

What is it with the ‘roided-up cops lately? No wonder they’re beating/tasing/shooting anyone whom they perceive as challenging them. I had to deal with some the other day, and even I - a middle-aged white lady - felt I had to move carefully and speak softly around them as they stalked around the crime scene. Talk…

Yeah-funny how selective the NRA is with their praise isn’t it???

Depends. If the guy is white, we’ll never fucking hear the end of it as justification for why everyone over the age of 3 ought to walk around strapped in all situation. They’ll never admit that this sort of situation is overall an anomaly rather than the rule.

“I think he did the right thing, because who knows what would happen?”

Punishment deserved: A parade and key to the city.

Not going to hold my breath for the NRA to issue a statement of support for this guy. But I think he did the right thing