Oh, white people. *sigh*

Unrequited love personified.

+1

Barry Bonds was a great baseball player.*

Nazi, Nazi, Nazi, Nazi, Nazi Nazi, Nazi, Nazi, Nazi, Nazi Nazi, Nazi, Nazi, Nazi, Nazi Nazi, Nazi, Nazi, Nazi, Nazi, Nazi

Watching Mariners baseball is like taking a fastball to the head.

First Ackley, now Marshawn Lynch. Lemme guess what's next... Clint Dempsey taking a wiz on the firemen statue in Pioneer Square?

He acted like "he had been there before." The operative word here being "acted".

Every time Charles hits a golf ball Andy Kaufman smiles.

sounds like "turrrrrible".

The World Cup is almost over.

"Dude, we won. You can shave now."

If given the choice of drinking either of those two cans of misery, or having R. Kelly piss directly into my mouth? I would seriously consider the latter.

Please make the 2018 team all black.

The Mariners have more issues than just staying relevant in the AL West, apparently.

The Brazilian barkeep then pulled out his dick and pissed in the German's beer without him knowing.

Ian Darke can dust off his famous...."...and they were lucky to get nil." quote.

Please tell me those chuckleheads who drove from Albany are going to make documentary. Holy shitbox!

Seriously, go fuck yourself.