I wish we just got these instead.

Phase 4 : Porn

$700 + $7/month to save a stamp every year?

That reminds me, I’ve started a kickstarter for this new company, its call Squeel. Square wheels. They are like regular wheels, but square, because round wheels are for squares! It takes a special square tire that costs a little more, about $500 a tire, but offers the benefits of not being part of the round wheel…

If this takes off (and for the love of all that is good, I hope it doesn’t), here are some things I plan to invent:

Phase 2: Something something mobile billboards.

So, who wants to lay odds on the amount of time before someone hacks* the DMV and changes every license plate in the state of California to “PENIS”?

Crack-pipe all the way. Because you will soon get sick or random dudes rolling up to you and asking if you ‘got any’. And no, they won’t be referring to Gray Poupon.

2nd/3rd gear: The fact that the Crooked Trump administration has serious trouble getting along with Canada and Japan and just does shit without thinking just shows how incompetent, difficult and chaotic things are at the White House these days. With some luck, the Republicans will lose control of the house in the mid…

Nissan confuses the heck out of me.

They seem to just “miss the ball” on well , everything.

Like they are 98% of the way there with 1 glaring issue... on every car.

Someone said something you don’t like and you want them to leave. K. Got it.

If Trump keeps proposing bad policies that will negatively affect the car industry then you’re going to keep seeing Trump’s name in The Morning Shift.

...every morning is nothing but whack the Trump pinata again.

I didn’t know they still sold the Frontier. That thing has to be way overdue for a redesign.

I voted NP originally since it’s a low mileage, fully loaded up W12. Yeah, it’ll be a maintenance nightmare, but if you keep up with it, it will be badass.

Obligatory oh and CP.

The owner managed to make a very classy, sophisticated car look like a drug dealer’s Chrysler 300. Congrats asshole, and CP.

On its own, in terms of condition and value, I’d say NP, but thinking about the target demographic for this car, I’m having to vote CP, and at pretty much any price, because no one who drives an “Executive” package Audi is going to want to show their face in a used one from 2006 that’s been disguised to look like a…

Hahahahahaha...sorry, let me catch my breath. With a 12, nigh 13 year old Audi you are basically buying yourself the scary Victorian house at the end of the street that everyone marvels at but you know people get murdered and turned into wall art in there. I’m telling you from experience, do NOT go in there.

Its very pertinent. It is precisely the reason why I don’t take taxis. One year in Philadelphia just as a blizzard was hitting all public transportation had stopped & the only things riding up & down the street were taxis. Me & 3 other black guys stood for over 30 minutes as we attempted to flag down drivers to no…