I don’t know Platform, but I always hate to see this. I’m not incredibly concerned with whether it’s considered “craft” or not any longer, but the more space AB-InBev buys on craft shelves all over the country, the more they’ll be pushing out the little guys. And as someone in one of the largest beer hubs in the…

That part about fuel in TLJ pissed me off so much. It comes out of absolutely no where, as fuel was never mentioned once in Star Wars. Other than that, TLJ is fine.

I was at a funeral last week and someone’s phone chimed. TWICE.

AND THE DISREGARD OF THE FUCKING MUTE BUTTON. I can’t think of the last time I was on a conference call and didn’t hear the ambient noises of an office/car/house fill the call bridge. I was recently at a board meeting where one of the directors (an Old) was home sick and joined by phone. The only times he would’ve…

No. There are only two truths universally acknowledged about The Last Jedi

“at full volume, because how else will I hear my phone when it’s at the bottom of my bag?”

And when they either:

AND IT’S NOT LIKE THESE PEOPLE DIDN’T GROW UP WITH PHONES. The average fresh senior just getting eligible for social security has probably had a cellphone for twenty years. Two decades. Some of them have had a cell phone since the 80s. They’ve probably had a smartphone for at least ten years. Proper phone etiquette is…

Youngsters don’t talk on the phone. They just watch terrible music videos on them at volume 10. Bonus points to the assholes wearing $300 headphones like a fucking hat while doing so.

Yeah, I think it’s a matter of degree. “Futzing” with something implies one is tinkering in a certain deliberate, if technically ignorant, way. “Fucking” with something on the other hand suggests a much more careless/reckless manner. Grandpa spends the afternoon futzing with things in his workshop while sucking on a…

People are nostalgia bullies. God knows I am. The second I had the chance indoctrinate my kids into Star Wars, I seized it. If they like what I like, then I feel cool and validated. As a result, they get Space Leia. It’s a problem.

Sometimes I feel like gray is better than losing it though? Like I know your hair is changing to the Color of Advanced Age, but at least you have hair! And then there are the poor saps who don’t bald symmetrically. 

“So a concept that might once have seemed novel now seems like it’s made one too many laps around the track.”

*Throws just-completed manuscript for I Like to Shit on the Rug in the trash can with a tired sigh.*

Honestly, with the sorts of things you’ve accomplished with your Moab projects, this one seems like a slice of the baked good of your choice. 

If there’s anyone who can pull it off, it’s you. Godspeed David, keep proving the naysayers wrong

I routinely mistake Babylon Bee headlines for Daily Caller and Steven Crowder (among others). headlines. The problem is that so-called legitimate political positions on the right are often so wacky that there’s not much room left to create humor by making statements so “extreme” that reasonable people would assume…

Right wing people live in a dark fantasy world.

It was made in 1973. Hummer didn’t exist and Travelalls were still being made. The good news is that only 3 Travelalls were hideously mutilated like this.

do you want mad cow disease (kuru)?  because this is how you get mad cow disease (kuru).

The dreaded ‘UULK UUULLK URRRK ULLLK’ means start frantically looking  for the cat to move it somewhere you can wipe down easiky enough.