When my dad’s grandmother was getting really bad, he had a dream that he was in the middle of the woods with his (already deceased) grandfather. Dad asked, “Why don’t you go get her? She’s suffering.” His grandfather said, “I’m not sure she wants me to.” (They had a difficult marriage.) Dad assured him that she did.…

At least you are well positioned for getting the shit scared out of you.

I’ve only told this story to my closest friends. I haven’t even confided in my sister (for fear of the obvious shame). Please buckle in because this tale needs to be told in length.

I housesat for my best friend’s parents (who were like my second parents) before I moved out west. It was a pretty sweet deal: I took care of their three dogs, two cats, and bird and got the run of a four-story farm house style surbabn pad with a pool and 80 inch HDTV.

This is less scary and just paranormal..

Every goddamn year, I open this story LIKE A SUCKER while I’m on the toilet pooping. And now I’m afraid to move.

I have a liberal friend who hates Hillary with the intensity of a thousand burning suns who thinks now is the time to vote third party. I’ve been pointing out that no, this is the time for third parties to start running for school boards, city councils, and other small local positions so they’re known and understood…

I’ve heard that Gloria Allred is now representing Mt. Everest in a suit against Mr. Johnson.

How incredibly sad and totally fucking preventable. I don’t necessarily believe in an afterlife, but I hope if there is one this woman is finally reunited with her son and covered with love.

Yay! Something not horrifying! Yay!

I lived right around the corner from a PP clinic in my 20s, and the staff was amazing! I had “catastrophic” insurance only at the time (I’m an oldz), so annual exams, etc were out of pocket. I could barely afford my bc. Because of PP, I learned I had a health issue that put me at greater risk for TSS, PP identified…

post birth check-up:

Oh girl, I do.

You were probably yeasty.

my obgyn once delivered a baby that was HOLDING ONTO THE IUD THAT TRIED TO THWART IT.

This is a gross thing my doctor and I experienced together.

After having x-rays of my spine from neck to tailbone, I had an orthopedic doc say with a chuckle “Man, that must’ve been one hell of a car wreck.”

...closure...

Dude. I can’t let my vajayjay get all grey and junk . It feels like that might be the end of my non-existent sex life