Holy fuck

My dad didn’t like kid movies so he let me watch whatever he was watching. I saw a lot of Vietnam war movies and whatever horror movies I wanted to watch.

My mother chose “Spanking the Monkey” at the video store and adolescent me was too mortified to tell her what that phrase meant so instead I had to watch it with her and be even more mortified.

I feel you, my mom picked the royal tenenbaums the day after I was released from a psychiatric hospital for an attempted suicide. She felt so bad.

JFC, why didn’t I think of that?

“don’t worry, we didn’t get nothing on your car.”

AND she wants to give her children AS MUCH AS SHE CAN.

Why are mothers the worst at picking movies?!

WOW

Yes and i would have mentioned that but after ruminating on the experience that felt more ‘weird supposed to see’ than ‘wierd not supposed to see’.

I had a boss who was not tech-savvy. He was also gay. His office computer was almost always fucked up and loaded with gay porn pics and videos. I’d fix it and just casually say “You got a lot of media files taking up space. Sholud I clean them out?” “Uh...yeah, probably.”

She saw I was sketched out, and hugged me, to comfort me, I guess.

When I was on maternity leave my son used to sleep very, very briefly in the morning at about 8.30. I had about half an hour to shower, dress, tidy up after breakfast, put laundry on etc etc. It was always a mad dash. The kitchen window faced the kitchen window of the flat next door, which was about six feet away.…

So many things here. I’m cringe-y about razors in that area to begin with, but wielded by someone else?

My dad is recently widowed and living alone. My Mom was sick for a long time and he doesn’t seem interested in dating. BUT...I have had multiple incidents in the last 3 years of running into things I don’t want to see 1. Cleaning out his car found Mapquest(!) directions to strip clubs 2. Helping him sort out his…

Visiting my bf’s grandparents...it was a lovely house, and I went upstairs to the hallway to look at the view of the valley. When I turned around to go back down, his grandma was there. Naked. Wandering around in the upstairs hallway. Naked. Ok, she had a towel, but was only drying her hair with it. I was so…

When I was 7 or 8 the stairs in our house had a turning to the upstairs landing, and this structure made a perfect ‘poop’ for my little brother and I to play Pirate Ship.

My wife and I were staying with my in-laws while we were house shopping. One morning, I was getting ready to take a shower in their almost never used guest bathroom. When I grabbed a towel off the shelf, a pharmacy bag came tumbling down, spilling its contents onto the floor.

I worked in sales for a software company, and part of my job was doing installations of drivers and stuff. I had a customer who I had gotten to know pretty well, and his wife on a nodding basis. They were a good-looking couple in their 40s and I in my 20s. The customer had asked me to come re-install something, and…

I don’t look at other people’s tech without prefacing my perusal with a half-joke: “Sooo...there’s nothing on here that’s gonna gross me out?” or “You closed all your porn tabs, right?” or words to that effect.