I kinda like her neck circus. I’m a dude, and I have zero taste in jewelry. Just ask my poor wife.

YES. This is one of my biggest problems with democrats—they don’t fight back. They don’t want to play dirty. And so they get ran over time and again. This is not the time to “give Trump a chance” this is a time to listen to what Trump told us he believes and believe him.

My wife is a huge fan, so we went and saw her in person. Her and a food magazine editor sat and talked for 2 hours. Yes. That’s what the event was. I can’t believe I paid for that. Well, I guess my wife did attend a concert with me that she really didn’t want to see...

It goes in phases. This shit was hot when my mom got married in the 70's. She got divorced so now I have a monogrammed set of moscow mule mugs where the monogram doesn’t make sense to anyone. Monograms are the worst.

Ina Garten may be annoying as fuck, but her recipes more than make up for the whimsy. We’ve got a few of her cookbooks, and most dishes will make your mouth cream your jeans.

I’m glad SOMEbody finally said it. If it works for them, hey, great. But she should know those “naps” aren’t going any further than a cuddle maybe.

Underrated answer from that Ina Garten travesty of an interview:

No thanks. I’m buying this $85 rock from Nordstroms with which I will hit myself repeatedly to unconsciousness until 2020.

Dear Ina,

I wasn’t sure that I would post it. She’s dying rn and I’m going to skip my class tomorrow so I can drive down to say goodbye. She will turn 88 on Dec 28th.

My gran Fanda divorced her abusive husband in 1970, though that legal decree was years in the making. These books saved her innermost self afterwards. She told me that after almost 20 years of daily assaults, that she felt when she left him that her body was a thing god made specifically for punishment. She didn’t…

Growing up, I remember my mother devouring every single Kathleen Woodiwiss, Danielle Steele, Debbie Macomber (even Sidney Sheldon) book as soon as they were released. We must have had hundreds of those paperbacks in our house. This was the same woman, btw, who went through our entire set of Encyclopedia Britannica…

I don’t really have any details. The Boyds are a wealthy family from Atlanta. The girls are more interested in being blonde, thin, and well-connected than being intelligent or having meaningful careers. Pretty normal, Buckhead stuff. Although usually when a Buckhead girl marries an old dude people talk about it and…

Josh Brolin, you did not deserve Diane Lane.

There was one that creeped me out SO bad even at the time. Put me off the show for good. It’s where the daughter, Denise, who I think is about 20 (an adult, anyway), has gotten married to a guy named Martin, after a whirlwind romance. She brings her new husband and stepdaughter home to introduce them to her parents,…

BELIEVE IN THE MAYO.

As ever, Martha is correct. I learned a few months ago that one of my fave food trucks uses mayo to grill their grilled cheeses and it is a game changer. Brioche grilled cheese with mayo for the win.

Ketchup is for when the tomatoes are out or season or bad, but mayo will always have a seat at my table, especially if it’s homemade. The only thing that unseats mayo is Thousand Island.

So I’m guessing he’s not the kind of guy who would approve of topping a burger with a doughnut, or boneless buffalo wings, or macaroni & cheese. All of which I’ve seen, none of which I’ve tried, because I’m not a fuckin’ reprobate.

How much longer can Notre Dame afford to be terrible before NBC loses interest in broadcasting their games?