Bernie is older than Clinton. You think he is much healthier? The only other viable candidates were O’Malley, who got very little support, and Biden, who is older than Clinton and didn’t want to enter.

You try wearing business clothes over a bullet proof vest in 85+ degree weather in a crowd and get back to me, Dr. I Love Big TDs. (And you want to add additional weight and bulk with a cooling rig?”

If the cat leaves the heads behind, I suggest mounting them on toothpicks along the baseboards so the mice REALLY know you mean business.

You are 100% correct. Trump did OK in the Republican debates because he only had to talk for seconds at a time and he could spend most of his time slinging highly quotable insults at his rivals. He could hide the rest of the time because the actual politicians were eager to get into policy fights with each other.

Isn’t it just precious when a dummy confirms their stupidity by blaming their befuddlement on a smart person?

I don’t even know if these remarkably inane insults are really about convincing people not to vote for Clinton. I think they’re just inchoate expressions of frustration by sad, stupid little men who can’t believe being white male American conservatives doesn’t mean they always get to have their way.

I moved into an apartment that had a really bad mouse infestation. My roommate adopted a kitten and the mouse problem was gone in a few months. Even though he was just a little guy, simply having a cat around was enough to convince them to go elsewhere.

One of the reporters who were on the campaign trail in 2000 sighed over the lavish meals and snacks that the Bush campaign offered reporters on Dubya’s private airplane. Gore, on the other hand, gave them stale sandwiches and off-brand snacks. That plus the nicknames Bush gave everyone was enough to convince our…

Where the hell are the mansplainers when they’re actually needed?

Conservative politicians have been praising Putin since Obama was elected president (and even before then...remember Dubya talking about how he could just tell Vlad was a swell guy by gazing into his beady eyes?)

Wait until the debates. I predict the media narrative will be that Clinton will be challenged by a surprisingly competent Trump in the first debate, then she will triumphantly knock his block off in the second or third and get a bounce.

Matt Lauer should be busted down from doing The Today Show to hosting The Biggest Loser.

Definitely a white male privilege thing. Scooter Libby deliberately leaked the name of a goddamned SPY in an act of political payback to her husband and he was pardoned by Dubya. General Petraeus deliberately leaked classified info to his mistress, knowing she’d publish it in a book about him. He got off with a slap…

It’s pretty easy to eat ice cream all the time and look great if you’re 23. Let’s do a follow-up on these folks in about 10 years and see how good they look then.

If Vanilla Ice went corporate

It was always fun to see how the same story was presented on Gawker vs. The Slot. There would be a clickbaity title, blatant bias, and misfired snark in the Gawker post while The Slot’s would be relatively neutral and more informative.

Powell lied about the timeline.

I’m flattered, honestly. Thank you :)

It’s so good! I was surprised because normally I have problems with 1 out of 3 things: writing (nothing takes me out of a book faster than clumsy writing), plotting, or underdeveloped fantasy/sci-fi elements. But Lexicon is great on all three things.

That poor woman looks like she’s protecting her daughter from Trump.