I always thought of it as this:

Weird that she’d only have to pay 1/3 of what she was paid to promote this fake festival...

She got paid $275k for mere instagram posts. I think she should pay it all back, not just $90k.

Oh I wasn’t aware I had to be personally attracted to the actors to enjoy the content. This will be a revelation for porn viewers everywhere.

You’d think all these stepmoms/stepsiblings would be able to keep performing under quarantine.

Haha I will never get tired of people thinking Onion headlines are real life.

The issue is being able to pay for the food, water, electricity, vets, and other care for the animals without the venue from guests which is required to meet that budget.

The California Condor would be extinct if not for zoos. Instead, it has a growing wild population.

I did a semester in Italy (before I knew anything about cocktails) and my friend ordered a martini and got served vermouth in a glass.

Because grocery stores aren’t allowing reusable bags at the moment, and it would be dumb to waste a disposable bag on that amount of stuff?

Yeah this little roundup doesn’t feel snarky or clever. Someone who managed to become and remain hugely successful after childhood stardom is getting divorced, has a prenup and she smokes!? Ok, it's so bitter I'm much more on MKO's side. She had a weird life, divorce's are hard. Normally I might be cool with poking…

The tone of dirtbag shifts so much. Lauren and Garrett’s are fun, cheeky, and poke at celebs. Joan just comes across as bitter and angry. To each their own, but their less fun to read. 

He sure does clear up a lot of things in this interview that previously made him look bad, but now essentially exonerate him! Interesting that he waited >10 years to clarify all of this information. It’s almost as if...he’s just twisting the truth to whatever better suits him.

I don’t think the point is to celebrate people of the actual city but rather the metonymic “Hollywood.”

Not a stretch at all. The angle of this piece is a little perplexing.

Is it maybe for The Stonewall Inn? It might be a stretch, but it’s all I got.

The original Hero, in Greek mythology, was a woman. Hero is feminine.

I really wish this was VOD instead of Disney Plus. I would easily pay $25-50 to stream Hamilton - still haven’t gotten around to seeing the musical, and this is a fraction of the price of tickets, with the original Broadway cast! But instead I’m likely going to end up getting one month of Disney Plus just to watch…

They could never do the Jackie Rogers Jr.’s $100,000 Jackpot Wad sketch now with Christopher Guest as Rajiv Vindaloo and Billy Crystal as Sammy Davis Jr.