You’ve constructed a post that makes very little sense. Has anyone, ever complained that white collar criminals in this country are treated unfairly harshly by the judicial system?

You have no idea what crime he was convicted of, do you? Hint: It wasn’t for selling tickets to a shitty festival in the Carribbean.

Definitely, white collar criminals have it so hard in the criminal justice system. And they should be given (more) lenient sentences because the President is a fraud. You make good a po*faaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrttt*.

I’ve said at least twice now that you’re “my kind of food writer”, but I never actually explained that it means I appreciate your occasional wholehearted embrace of pure junk food ingredients. This, however, crosses some vague line that I can’t quite define. I just can’t with bologna, and I’m not sure why that is or…

Selena Gomez was harassed because her ex is engaged? Wtf is wrong with people?!? What, exactly, is the thought process behind behaviour like that? 

Damn, you really missed the mark and the point, and took so many words to do so.

One of these men is black in word and deed...I’ll leave you to figure out which.

I can’t resist the pun: it’s actually blacklash.

Are you a woman? I left an abusive relationship and got shit for not being loyal. I also got shit for not leaving sooner. There is no right way to exist.

Of course it will. And Minnesota Nice isn’t going to cut it here. Salt the earth with this motherfucker. Put out every negative ad you can. And when he complains about the nasty tone of the campaign (he will), suggest that he’s too emotional for politics. Literally do not start one debate rebuttal without dismissively…

Yes, but it will focus on the couple raising their kid in the hotel so that the child can appreciate it, and run it smoothly when they come of age.

Kim’s got zero room for mocking how anyone performs politics as long as she’s married to Kanye.

I sense some sarcasm but let's not forget that he also has a lot of influence on what a lot of 50 and 60 year old men think as well. This could seriously damage her sales!

I believe it is a fact (maybe even a law) that you gotta get down on Friday.

Big old sign that says “If you try to fuck on this changing table, chances are you’ll be sorry it’s broken in about 9 months!” 

Of course the Weekend can get it. Monday not so much, especially if you have a case of the Mondays, Tuesday nope still too early check back later, Wednesday is called hump day but no humping from me but perhaps a nice spaghetti dinner, Thursday we’re getting closer, maybe maybe Thursday if it acts nice, Friday yes…

That’s sad for Taylor Swift because 70 year old men are the most coveted demographic in pop music.

I don’t think anyone is arguing you should be able to use the other gender gang bathroom. They’re asking when you find yourself staring at two lockable single use bathrooms and the one with your gender has someone within that you can hear visibly straining and farting and you need to pee RIGHT NOW.

A man walked into the ladies room after me at an airport last week. Not in a creepy way, but in an “airports are so mind-numbing I can’t process visual information anymore” way. He just sort of wandered in behind me. He wasn’t phased by a noticeable lack of urinals. He proceeded to pee in the stall next to mine.…

Correction: she did not maintain “an uncharacteristic coyness regarding her political affiliations”