HOLY MARY MOTHER OF NOPE.

This is horrifying and I will never sleep again.

You will hold poo in your hands. You will know the feeling of vomit in your hair. You will say things like “WE WEAR UNDERPANTS AT THE DINNER TABLE.”

That’s what baby containment devices are for, EXACTLY. Strap them into something on the bathroom floor and enjoy a few minutes of sweet, sweet shampooing.

That could be the argument for a fuck-up, though - if he *is* so PR-savvy, why risk alienating all those folks who are feeling warmer toward the Church because of him, just for a chat with a Pentecostal?

I don’t know about that. I’ve had it professionally done and still think I come out looking like a raccoon.

More than one, sadly:

THIS. Regardless of whether it was her boss (wasn’t clear from the letter), it was someone *senior* to her. “Be a peach” or “be a dear” or “be a champ” or any such colloquialism that uses an endearment should not - because the endearment implies either a) intimacy, or b) speaking to someone over whom you have some…

I’m an old, but if somebody sent me Teen Vogue I would totally read it.

That is the BEST joke. Truly.

I met him at a party once and although he was a little shorter than I expected, he was double the handsome and thrice as pleasant.

Gah, I was spelling her name wrong! BAD FANGIRL.

I LOVE YOU.

This is a perfect comment.

I was obsessed with Pirate Movie when I was about the same age (am also an old). I wanted to be Kristy MacNicol. I wanted pantaloons. I need to find it and watch it again.

ME. TOO. She was my first girl crush.

I second this.

PIRATE MOVIE 4EVER.

My first was about 40 hours. I had no idea it could take that long.

Room service at most hotels in the US includes a 'service charge' - usually 18% - and often a delivery fee as well. I once asked Twitter whether one is supposed to tip on top of all of this, and the general consensus (keep in mind that this is Twitter) was that the service charge is the enforced tip, akin to the…