I THINK YOU NEED TO GET A NEW DOCTOR TBH

We need to stop playing into the GOP narrative that we want free birth control. Under the ACA, we get birth control covered at 100% by our insurance, but we pay for the insurance. It’s not a handout. It’s simply requiring insurance to provide a benefit that the overwhelming majority of women need.

Mom jeans are never cute. It doesn’t matter how amazing your body is, you can’t wear them.

The sooner people realize McCarthy is in the top 5 of the funniest people who ever lived ever the better off we’ll all be.

Exactly. IF you want to know what a conservative is guilty of, you simply have to look at what they accuse others of. It’s because they simply cannot fathom that other people may be different than themselves, they assume that everyone is as horrible as they are.

Happy Friday!

Black Twitter, especially. Credit where credit is due.

Again, I’m sorry about all this. The last thing I want is to sit here like some goth nihilist dipshit and lecture everyone, and douse a seemingly festive occasion in cold piss. I wanna snap out of it. I want EVERYONE to snap out of it. I want America to wake up in a fevered sweat and realize what it’s done and…

Too bad we’ve let the terrorists win.

It must be really hard for you to have to hear about the terribleness that is happening in our country. The Democrats fear of Trump targeting Muslims is definitely the same as Republicans saying Obama was going to steal your guns and so I know how difficult it is for you to deal with these obviously equal scenarios.

Do you ever get really jealous of people’s cognitive dissonance? Even though you know you shouldn’t?

Vince Vaughn is white mediocrity personified. Of course he hates affirmative action. The last thing he wants is someone talented and capable threatening him.

Delaware isn’t even a real place. It only exists when someone from out of state is there to physically observe it...and then...it only exists for that person.

Nope. Nope. Nope. When you vote for someone who denies my humanity, you lose all compassion from me. They were fine with “the blacks”, Hispanics, small business owners, and women getting screwed over. They’re partially responsible for him being in office, so it serves them right. If that makes me harsh, try fearing…

That’s why you’re here, to feel sorry for them. I’m here to laugh at them.

Frederick Douglass is an example of somebody who’s done an amazing job....

Its black history month so let me take this opportunity to talk about me and how unfair the press is and let me name check a few token well-known black folks, inner cities and scene.

I mean, seriously, why did they even need a poet for the inauguration?