*Stops shoveling bagel bites in mouth*

Just go get a regular crispy chicken sandwich and put some mozzarella and marinara on it. Better yet, use the Popeye’s chicken sandwich as a base instead.

I didn’t fill out anything and got a check for almost $600 for a class action suit against DeVry. Check just showed up one day out of the blue

I literally once spent about 4 hours tracking down all the info for one of those securities Class Actions and got $7.32 for my troubles.  I would have been better off panhandling or taking a minimum wage job in 1974.  Since then, they all go in the garbage.

What???!!! No bleach cocktail as the aperitif?

Wellll...I’m glad I saw this at 2:30 in the afternoon and not, y’know, right before bedtime...

“I’m not mad, I’m angry! MOOOO!”

Yeah, I’m having a tough time seeing a downside here, just like the pro-bleach for COVID crowd.

Anyone who thinks this is a good idea, ought to be encouraged to do so. They should take a good ol’ drink of swamp water to wash it down with, and finish it off with an after dinner tidepod.

So what’s wrong with me?  I’ve had food poisoning (thanks to a restaurant that felt that hand-washing enforcement was only for liberals or something), but I certainly didn’t get any kind of high from the after-effects.

“delirium after an explosive gastric response”

Sounds like a real great trip, man.

“Whatever happened to natural selection, survival of the fittest? The kid who swallows too many marbles doesn’t grow up to have kids of his own. Simple as that.”

What pairs well with old meat? Some 2020 vintage Lysol and a side of TidePods.

Someone I know got busted for elder abuse after spending years whining about how much he did to take care of his aging mother with dementia. Turned out he racked up over $40k in credit card debt in her name, remortgaged her house even though it was totally paid off, cashed in her dang funeral account, and stole over…

I’m reviving Pissing Contest with a new topic every week.

We did this with one of the recent Jurassic Park remakes. For whatever reason the crowd was FEELING it and it was so fun. But at one point the dinos ate somebody and this kid yelled 'GOT EM' and half the theatre burst out laughing. It was a weird showing where the crowd was all talking and generally obnoxious but…

When the original Mortal Kombat movie came out, we saw it in the theater opening night, and the crowd was VERY into it. I don’t know what mind meld happened, but every time a fight was over, the crowd would erupt in a loud cheer, then go silent for a moment, then simultaneously shout “FINISH HIM!” and we were all in…

The one thing I could see with Eden is that she wasn’t for sure fertile, and all of the handmaids we’ve seen have had at least one child. But yeah, they definitely intended to kill Jeanine for less, and mutilated a handful of other handmaids for *way* less.