"I'LL FLAUNT MY TONED STOMACH ALONE!"

GRADE: F (a cursed realm in which you can only speak in tabloid cliches, particularly "I'LL RAISE THIS BABY ALONE!" and "FLAUNTS HER TONED STOMACH")

Wow, it really is all over the Gawker network:

No, so that's why people have ghost writers!

Let me just say I love love love the work you guys have been doing here at Gizmodo en Español. The MWC coverage is great, especially the hands-on posts. Keep up the good work!

(I'm Brazilian, I can read in Spanish just fine... pero escribir en español no es muy fácil para mi!)

Yeah, about that "rumor" that Friends is going to be back next year... it's not: http://www.gossipcop.com/friends-coming…

Oh my God, I love this video! Brian McElhaney from BriTANicK (comedy duo with Nick Kocher) and Michael Swaim (from Cracked).

She looks great!

Botched plastic surgery, possibly: http://www.eonline.com/news/471281/la…

Took us long enough, but here you go: http://lifehacker.com/5873325/the-be…

Is this on the old design? I have the new one and can't go back.

From the tweet, listening to **rq* = listening to "burqa"

Are you guys sure it's from AP? I see no mention from it here.

YES.

Hah, me too...

"Haven't heard any complaints about the touchpad, build quality, reliability, etc."

I second that motion.

So the higher price actually did NOT make sense: now it costs US$ 1,449, less than the Windows version.

"To prepare it for consumption, the lamp must be cleaned and submerged in purified water for an hour to soften up. “The consistency after soaking the lamp in water for an hour is like wet Gummy Bears,” says Vetterlein."

"We can't help but feel it's not going to affect your epic Call of Duty: Black Ops 2 sessions all that much."