I think you mean GOOP-y, at least for Chris Martin.

The real problem here is that you think Hawaiian and Buffalo chicken toppings are indicative of “artisan hipster”-ism

I know it seems more secure to take the snap from under center with the running backs acting as bodyguards next to the QB, but that always ends up being a testy testes scrum that Greg Schiano can bum rush.

Out of curiosity, do you feel similarly about other cocky, shit-talking athletes like, say... Anderson Silva?

Uh, or just don’t touch strangers. That’s a normal reaction, not “geez I really feel like tickling a random person’s feet without their knowledge or consent” lol

lol you’re definitely pissing on the parade, but not with logic.

While I can’t supply the studies/evidence to suggest it, I have a feeling that driving is one of those activities that is inherently dangerous regardless of operator skill. So much of driving is about the ability to calculate decisions on the fly, predict others’ behavior, and react quickly. A computer can do all of…

This isn’t even close, in my opinion. Like a commenter below said: Thermaworks Thermapen. Super-fast, super-accurate. Accept no substitutes (I did, and I learned my lesson after it pooped out on me).

This isn’t even close, in my opinion. Like a commenter below said: Thermaworks Thermapen. Super-fast,…

“Editorial consistency” isn’t really a good thing — all that means is a publication acts like a monolith, instead of a collection of people with different takes. I prefer the latter

I could’ve sworn my acid trip was done by the time I got into work today

Yes, because it’s right there in the police academy text: “If a bitch step to you, call yo homies and break his leg in public, teach him a lesson”

Wait, nevermind. I was reading the gangbangers’ manual.

This is a weird, smellier twist on Pinkham’s Law right here

What do you do with your arms and hands when you’re at a rock concert?

Gotcha. I couldn’t tell because I kind of nodded off while reading your long-winded, hilariously patronizing diagnoses of complicated human behavior.

lol @ the armchair psychologist

Disagree, and hard. Possession changes in football are practically rare compared to soccer. The value of the former is way higher than the latter.

Man, can we just talk about how uncomfortable police interviews are for victims, especially when the crime is sexual abuse?

These feel more like general emergency tips rather than anything specific to zombies. So, in addition:

The absolute biggest barrier for me getting on a bike is the matter of safety. My girlfriend says no way, my parents say no way, and everyone I know who rides says “Well, it’s a matter of when, not if” — they’ve all gotten into at least minor accidents (some major, too).

No, it’s not. The reason why they’re able to invest into this kind of time-consuming, unprofitable journalism is because they have so much revenue from the stupid shit.